Amor Vincit Omnia
by 24 Love Geek
Summary: Natalie Buxton and Pat Kerrigan femslash, don't like don't read begins in the middle of their to the death fight. My first fanfic so be nice! Rated M for a later chapter
1. Alternate fight ending

Amor vincit omnia

Ok, summary of this is a different version of series eight right in the middle of their fight. It is focused on the relationship between Buxton and Kerrigan. Nat/pat femslash, don't like, don't read. Simple.

...

Natalie struggled as hard as she could, Pat pinning her down by digging her elbow into her ribs while gripping her hair tightly, determined to keep her down. Both women were panting with the roughness of their fight as Pat reached towards the brick again almost getting a grip on it. Natalie saw this and in a moment of madness her terror exploded out of her. Pat flinched as Natalie screamed, who took her enemy's moment of hesitation to punch Pat hard on the side of her head.

Pat's grip slackened in pain as the fist made contact with her temple, Natalie throwing her off. Lunging for the brick she quickly took up the position that had her in her vulnerable position seconds before. Pat cried in fear as she saw the fury in Natalie's face, struggling furiously but she couldn't shift Natalie's vice grip. She meet Natalie's eyes, something menacing in them that made her own widen with fear. She was going to die, she knew it, the nonce had won and she couldn't do anything to stop it. Unable to hide her terror a whimper of fear escaped Pat's lips as Natalie raise the brick over her head. Pat bowed her head and squeezed her eyes shut awaiting the sickening crack smashing her skull...

She waited, but the blow never came.

For a second Pat thought it was already over, but she could still feel the weight and warmth of Natalie's body on her own. She wanted to look but was afraid of what she would see. After a few seconds she could bear it no longer opening her eyes and raising her head to look up into Natalie's face.

She stared. Natalie still had the brick aloft with her raised arm but her expression was what shocked Pat. An expression of such confusion. She appeared to be struggling; an internal battle seemed to be going through her mind. There was anger in her face, as expected but something else was there too, something which restricted her arm from striking. Fear was also showing itself, as even she couldn't seem to understand why she could not bear to bring the brick down.

A couple of times her arm tensed and the expression of anger returned but as she went to deliver the blow the brick seemed to hit an invisible barrier constructed for some unknown reason, before being raised back to its higher position. Pat frowned in puzzlement as the woman she hated; who had ruined so many innocent lives yet could not seem to kill her, of all people. The fear rose in Natalie's face as Pat tried to rise herself into sitting position.

Natalie gripped the scruff of Pat neck to slam her back down to the concrete floor. Raising the brick again her face screwed up in concentration as she tried to force her arm to obey in bringing it down with deadly force. Again it hit the invisible barrier, the confusion in her face intensifying as her unknown internal battle raged. Natalie's heart raced as panic filled her; unable to finish off the bitch that had ruined everything she had built up before she had come along. The one who had drugged her and now would kill her given half the chance. Yet she couldn't bring herself to do it, it was pathetic.

Pat thought it safe to risk trying to sit up again, this time meeting no resistance, raising herself level to Natalie. Natalie stared wide-eyed into Pat's face, brick still raised up, tensed into position. Pat tried to decipher the mix of emotions in Natalie's eyes, understand why she was showing mercy, whether or not to trust it. There was clear confusion, with anger and fear but something else Pat could not decode. Pat slowly moved her hand to the inner elbow of Natalie's arm applying pressure to try to force it to lower. Natalie whimpered as she resisted, refusing to give up her defence.

As Pat applied more pressure suddenly Natalie dropped the brick and before Pat could react, wrapped her arm round Pat's neck gripping her hair and pulled her towards her kissing her hard on the lips. Pat tensed in shock as she felt Natalie's warm mouth on her own letting out a moan of surprise. Loosening her grip very slightly Natalie passionately kissed her again, willing her to return the kiss. The seconds passed, before Pat moved her arm from Natalie's arm to her shoulder shoving her back aggressively breaking the kiss, twisting her hips to once again switch positions. Natalie yelped in fear, her eyes widening unsure what was happening.

Pat had the brick in one hand risen up, the other holding Natalie by the scruff of her neck. Natalie gripped Pat's hand clinging to her, unsure how to react as Pat pulled her so close she could feel her breath on her face. Both women stared into one another's eyes, trying to tell what the other was thinking. Slowly Pat lowered the brick gripping Natalie with both hands.

'Why did you hesitate?' Pat demanded. Natalie stammered searching for an answer she couldn't give. 'Why!' Pat repeated shaking the other woman violently. In panic Natalie grabbed Pat's head and head-butted her causing her to stagger off Natalie.

Natalie leaped up, turning the other way and ran towards the door leading back into the prison, leaving Pat dazed on the floor. Pat quickly gathered herself and set off in pursuit the opposite way she had done earlier. Breathing heavily she followed Natalie through the corridors, slowing as she say the Julies ahead with Miss Mandy Goodhue just about to go through the gates. Natalie reached them first, still panting which caught the attention of Goodhue.

'What have you two been up to?' She demanded as Natalie felt Pat draw level with her. 'Feeling better now all of a sudden?' She asked Pat.

'Yes Miss' Pat replied after a second remembering her excuse to run after Natalie. It seemed hours ago now.

'What's that on your head?' Mandy indicated the bruise swelling on the side of Pat's head.

'Oh…I…' Pat begun, trying desperately to come up with an answer on the spot. Being put down the block for fighting would not do either of them any good. Natalie seemed to think so to and she quickly butted in.

'She went to the loo and hit her head while being sick' Natalie chuckled arrogantly as Pat looked at her, hoping she would come up with something believable 'I went to the loo on my way back from dumping the bags and found the stupid bitch knocked out, but just coming round unfortunately' she continued with a nasty smirk which seemed to be enough to convince the others, who turned on her.

'Thank god, who knows what _you_ would have done given half the chance!' snapped Julie J glaring at Natalie who merely sneered back at her.

'Right come on you lot we have to get back to work in soon and you lot need to change!' said Goodhue with raised eyebrows looking sceptical opened the gate and ushered everyone through. As they went into G-wing Natalie trotted quickly up the stairs to her cell, wanting to escape the feeling Pat's eyes on her as she went. Pat watched her disappear before seeing the Julies gesturing for her to go with them into their cell.

'Why isn't she being caught for trying to escape?' Julie S demanded the second the door was closed. 'I didn't get beaten for no reason you know!'

'Things didn't go quite to plan.' Pat stated simply, which was true, neither the plan she had with the Julies nor her own more sinister plan had succeeded. Not that the Julies knew about that. 'She must have worked it out. Did either of you say anything?'

'Of course not! But now what are we going to do?' Julie J asked, sensing pressing Pat for details would not go down well. While Pat was less of a bitch than Natalie, pissing her off was still not a smart move.

'We'll have to come up with a different plan aren't we? But this time maybe we should not just get her locked up' Pat's eyes were menacing, full of hate, so much so the Julies exchanged a worried look. 'Maybe, we get rid of her once and for all.'

The Julies gaped. 'But…if we just catch her out, get her caught for other thing…' began Julie J

'No.' Pat cut her off sharply. 'She is too clever for that. Even if we succeed, she'll still find a way to hurt innocent people, even in here. The only way to stop her is to put her in the ground. Now you are with me or with her.' Pat ended her furious eyes appeared on the edge of madness and seemed to burn holes into the Julies as she looked challengingly at both of them.

'With you, obviously. As if we would ever side with her' Julie S said after a terrified look from Julie J 'But seriously Pat, she is going to be after our blood now, she will know we helped you! And no offence, I'm in no mind to be beaten to a pulp again'

'I know. I'll try to be around more to keep her at bay. I can't promise anything though. Now we best change, or Goodhue will be even more suspicious.' Pat turned and left the cell, leaving the Julies staring at each other, wondering what they had got themselves into. Pat was becoming far too much like Buxton for their liking.

...

_Later that day_

Natalie stood in her cell in her tiny vest, inspecting her bruises in the mirror. She had a nasty one coming up on her shoulder, and as she lifted her top she saw a few coming out on her lower ribs. Groaning she held the cold and damp flannel to her bruises. As she did she stared at herself in the mirror, cursing herself for allowing the bitch to do this to her and not punish her for it. No one got away with hurting her, least of all the one who had made her life a misery ever since her arrival. So why hadn't she finished her off when she had the chance? She couldn't make sense of it. As for kissing her, what was that about? Must be a whore's response to danger, try and shag your way out of it.

As she was lost in these thoughts, her cell door swung slowly open and the woman she least wanted to see appeared. Pat shut the door quietly behind her and looked over the other woman, lingering on the bruise on her shoulder and then her toned torso now supporting the bruises she had inflicted. For a second neither woman moved, as their eyes meet in the mirror.

'Piss off.' Natalie eventually muttered, returning her attention to treating her bruises. When Pat didn't move she impatiently snapped 'Did you hear what I said?'

'Since when did I pay attention to anything you told me to do?' Replied Pat sourly, moving closer to Natalie, who lowered her flannel whilst eyeing Pat suspiciously in the mirror. Feeling Pat's presence far too close Natalie turned to glare at her waiting for her to tell her what she wanted.

After a nearly a minute had passed while neither spoke, Natalie grew impatient and broke the silence. 'Did you want something Kerrigan? Or this a social call?' She added sarcastically.

'You've been avoiding me.' It wasn't a question; it was stated as a fact.

'Well amazingly enough you are not the person I would actively seek out, and surprisingly you trying to kill me hasn't suddenly made you higher on my list'

'Well, who knows, maybe trying to shove your tongue down my throat might have something to do with you desperately trying not to be in the same room as me.'

Natalie stiffened. Glaring at Pat she snarled 'Well, over twenty years in the whore business, it kinda comes as a reflex to danger, so don't get your hopes up'

'Strange as you could have just smashed that brick into my skull. Would have been simpler don't you think?' Pat asked challengingly, not ready to accept such a crude answer.

'Well you didn't over dose me when you had the chance, guess I thought I would return the favour. Now we are even.' Natalie shrugged and turned away walking towards her draws and started rummaging for something.

'Yer right, as if _you _would be that honourable' Pat snapped

'Well don't worry, it wouldn't happen again, you can count on that' Natalie stated, finding the jumper she was looking for and pulling it over her head. 'Next time, bitch they'll be burying you when I'm finished with you' She muttered as she approached Pat standing almost nose to nose with her then going to her cell door, looking back to glare at Pat, indicating that she should leave, before leaving her cell.

'They'll be burying you first.' Pat replied darkly 'I expect you'll be spat out of hell though, nonce' adding a twist to the last word before heading towards the kitchens where the Julies were working. Natalie just stared ahead of her whilst walking down the stairs, trying to calm the fury that the other woman was so good at causing. She had to do something to get rid of that bitch, or she would explode! As for the Julies, she had ideas for them to make them pay for trying to have her killed.

Username:2004206 Page: 5 28/05/2010


	2. Next day

_Next day_

Natalie headed down to breakfast, thoughts buzzing from her dream from the night before. Having that sort of dream about someone who wants to kill you is never good. She didn't even like women, let alone_ that _woman. It was scary how real it felt though, and how good. Shaking it out of her mind she collected her tray and went to be served.

Pat ran her brush roughly through her hair, trying to untangle the endless knots. After a couple minutes she gave it up as a lost cause and sighed as she left her cell to head down to breakfast. As usual, her stomach was speaking very loudly about the need for food, and low blood sugar levels made her very irritable, as her ex-boyfriend had found out. As she enter the food hall she couldn't help but make eye contact with Buxton, who after a couple seconds of glaring looked down and continued playing with her breakfast.

The Julies were just refilling the coffee jug when Julie S glanced up and had her attention drawn to Buxton, who was staring unblinking. Frowning she followed Natalie's line of sight and came to Pat. Looking a couple times unbelieving in between them she confirmed to herself that it was not her imagination, but leant in towards Julie J and asked 'Ju, is it me or is Buxton staring a bit too much at Pat?' She whispered.

Julie J glanced up from the bacon she was frying and looked to see what Ju meant. She too looked between the two of them, nodding then replied 'Ju, I don't like the look Buxton got, it don't look right'

'Yer, what's that all about?' Said Julie S as Natalie seemed to become aware that she was staring and looked back to her breakfast with a martyr's expression. The Julie's exchanged a puzzled look and continued to serve people's breakfast. As Pat drew level with them Julie S whispered 'Do you know Buxton's been staring at you?'

'What? No' Pat said glancing over her shoulder towards where Natalie was emptying her untouched plate into the bin. As if sensing her eyes on her she looked up to meet blue eyes to green. Then Natalie looked past Pat to where the Julies stood, her deadly expression making the Julies instinctively recoil away from her. She had plans for them, that was for sure. As Natalie turned and marched away Pat turned back to the Julies.

'So are you going to tell what happened yesterday or not?' Julie J demanded

'Like I said, she figured out what we had planned.' Pat replied then glanced over her shoulder before adding 'I will tell you later ok?'

As everyone finished work that evening Pat and some other prisoners were waiting to go back into the prison. Pat had been desperately trying to come up with a plan to get rid of Natalie. It wouldn't be easy; Natalie was clever and even worse aware of her campaign. She had to think of something, or like Natalie had said, she would be the one killed. As she walked into G-wing she was surprised to see Lou Stokes waiting for her in the dining area, and worse, she was with Natalie. Panic filled Pat as she glared at Natalie, what had the bitch said? She tried casually to approach her wing governor, thinking rapidly of any excuses she might need.

'Hi Kerrigan, I been meaning to speak to you, I thought I would wait until now, as I'm sure your talents were needed to keep those plants in check' Lou smiled flirtatiously as she said it, causing Pat to blush slightly.

'Ah hem' Natalie butted-in ruffled by this pathetic flirting 'if its Kerrigan you needed to speak to, why am _I_ here?' She inquired casually, as she was also unsure of the wing governor's intention.

'Because what I want to speak to you about involves both of you.' Lou replied simply resting on the edge of the table. Natalie and Pat exchange an accusingly look, mutely communicating the question if the other had snitched. 'The prison service is over-crowded, as you two know I'm sure, and you two are the only ones who have single cells. Therefore Buxton,' Lou said looking round at the blonde woman 'you need to move your stuff into Kerrigan's cell by lights out, understand?' It took a couple of seconds for what she had said to sink in, and then both women stared in horror at her before shouting their protests.

'WHAT??'

'NO WAY!'

'I'm not sharing with _her_!!'

Lou cut off their shouts with a simple 'I'm sure you two can handle each other. By lights out.' She said nodding towards Natalie before leaving the two women standing there still gaping in shock. While they were both relieved not to have been found out, this was almost worse than a couple weeks down the block. After almost five minutes, Natalie finally pulled herself together before turning on Pat.

'I'm _not _sharing with you!' She declared angrily before storming off to her cell and slamming the door behind her. In her cell she stared around herself thinking desperately. She didn't want to share with Kerrigan, the idea terrified her for so many reasons. For one, the bitch wanted to kill her, what would stop her smothering her in the middle of the night? She was already in for murder Natalie reasoned, what would stop her doing it again, she hated her enough not to care about being caught. And what about her stash? There was little left without a recent delivery due to her plan to escape, but her clever hiding spot on the outer window ledge was rare. She wouldn't share with that dyke, thought Natalie. Whatever happened. She looked cunningly around her cell, as an idea came to her.

Kerrigan was tidying her cell, reluctantly shifting her stuff to one side of the cell. She had shared her cell before, but never with someone she so detested. God knows what the nonce would get up to. She could kill her in the middle of the night, inject her with an overdose of something, who knows, she was clever enough to think of something. She would just have to think of something first. As she moved her books under her bed she heard a commotion outside, it sounded like people shouting. Intrigued she went out onto the landing just out her cell. The sound was coming from outside Buxton's cell; Miss Goodhue was clearly unable to get into the cell and was shouting something through the door at Natalie.

Typical, thought Pat, she never gives up without a fight. She went along the landing towards Mandy, where a crowd was gathering around her.

'Buxton TAKE THE BARRIER DOWN!' Mandy shouted into the door 'And you lot, clear off' she said to the crowd who made no effort to move. Pat wormed her way through, people respectfully moving out of her way. Sometimes being 'top dog' as Natalie put it had its advantages.

'What's happening Miss?' Pat asked Goodhue who was getting increasingly agitated as she began muttering curses under her breath.

'Never you mind!' She snapped, again addressing the door 'Buxton! Remove the barrier or you'll spend the week down the block!'

'I'm not sharing with the psycho dyke!' Came the reply, muffled as though the door had been padded.

'Cheers, love you too Buxton' Pat shouted back without thinking. Silence from within the cell. Natalie blushed unseen, leaning against the chest of drawers that propped her mattress against the door. Why was she blushing, she wondered, it had been a sarcastic remark from the woman she resented. Why had it caused a strange sensation in her gut? She shook herself violently, snap out of it she thought.

Outside her cell, Goodhue was radioing Joy Masterton, unsure of how to proceed. 'Buxton has barricaded herself in, ma'am, permission to force entry?' She said into her radio, watched by the crowd, after a second the radio crackled a reply only Goodhue could hear.

'Yes, Buxton ma'am, she has placed her mattress and something else against the door, I am unable to get her to cooperate. She doesn't want to share with Kerrigan. Permission to force entry ma'am?' Goodhue repeated. The reply came, clearly granting permission as Goodhue called some male officers over, who started slamming into the door with their shoulders. Inside the cell Natalie leaned her weight against her pile, taking the blows that were slamming her back. Again and again the blows came, very slowly edging the chest of drawers away from the door, despite Natalie's desperate efforts to keep it still.

In only five minutes the door was forced open, toppling the chest of drawers on Natalie as she gave a cry of fear when one of the drawers fell out, hitting her hard on the side of her head. She felt blood trickling out of the wound, bringing her hand up to cover the wound and to protect herself from further blows. The rest of the drawers followed the first, hitting her in various places including her already bruised torso, causing her to gasp in pain. Before she could recover she was being hosted up by one of the male officers and carried out of the cell. With the world spinning she could barely stay conscious but she still started struggling frantically, but the officer had a firm grip on her. As she was carried out the cell she saw Goodhue and could see her saying something that she couldn't quite register in her dazed state, beyond her she could see a small crowd, headed by Kerrigan. In her concussed condition, she lashed out at Pat despite her being obviously out of reach, but was restrained despite her final struggle before her agony made her lose consciousness.

Pat watched as they carried the unconscious Natalie down the stairs towards the hospital wing. The sight of her with blood coming from her head made Pat feel slightly sick, especially knowing that it was her Natalie was desperate to avoid sharing with. That look of terror Natalie had given her was enough to confirm that. Plus as Pat knew, it was probably the impact on the bruises she had inflicted on Natalie that had caused her agony. Shaking off her twinge of guilt, Pat turned with the rest of the crowd and headed back to her half tidied cell.

The Julies meet her on her way, giving her a look that showed they clearly still determined to find out what had really happened the previous day between Pat and Natalie. Seeing no way to avoid it, Pat signed and indicated towards her cell.

'So?' Julie S said leaning against the sink whilst Pat sat on her bunk. Julie J looked around for a place to sit, eventually sitting on the bunk that was suppose to be Natalie's.

'I told you, she must have found out our plan. I went to check that she had fallen for it when she attacked me' Pat said 'We fought, hence the bruises' She continued pointing to her still swollen temple.

'But… you were on your own… how did you both come back alive?' Julie J said shocked unable to see how this could have happened. Pat thought hard for a second, for some reason not wanting to enclose the intimate moment between her and Buxton. This wish to keep it private was strange but she couldn't bring herself to tell them.

'During the fight we were apart, and she took the chance to run back into the prison.' She said eventually. 'I don't know why, maybe she didn't think she could kill me' Pat shrugged in an attempt to prevent further questions. The Julie S frowned at Pat, sensing she was leaving something out, but wise enough not to push it. Looking at Julie J they silently communicated that this was the best they were going to get.

'So, have you thought of another plan?' Julie J inquired, slightly nervous of what she may hear. Neither of the Julies were keen on being involved in murder, even when it was evil and twisted Buxton. Fortunately, Pat just shook her head.

'No, not yet, its not going to be easy, especially with her going to be sharing my cell. She's going to be watching like a hawk.' Pat muttered sourly. Then the officers came round and the Julies had to return to their own cell. As the lights went out Pat looked out her window, lost in thought. Her mind wondered to the fight, the feeling of Natalie's lips on hers, and the sight of her unconscious body being carried away. The woman typically managed to be on Pat's mind, but for a different reason than usual.

On the other side of the prison, Buxton stirred from her unconscious state to find herself in a hospital wing bed. Slowly as her thought caught up with her along with the ache and pain of her injuries, her eyes stung and she cried silently into her pillow. Not just because of the physical pain, but the anger at the woman who had caused this. Soon, she thought, she would pay for this. She had to. Nobody got away with hurting her like this. She had to act, or she would go crazy.

Username:2004206 Page: 5 05/05/2010


	3. Deal

_Next Morning_

Sunlight poured in through the window of the hospital wing, its rays coming to rest on Natalie's face. She stirred, and through her groggy thoughts, she tried to figure out the messages her body was sending her. Her head hurt, and the rest of her body felt like she has been thrown down some stairs. Wouldn't be the first time, she thought blearily. Still groggy she opened her eyes and lifted her head slightly, blinking the hospital room into focus. As she took in that piece of knowledge she slowly recalled the events of the day before. Groaning she lowered her head back down and dragged the comfortable covers around her.

'Morning Natalie' a deep voice rumbled. She raised herself slightly and peered to the source of the voice at the foot of her bed. Dr Dunlop smiled down at her, despite her stony expression. 'Did you sleep well?' he continued kindly. A grunt came in reply. 'You took a blow to the head, along with a few other places as I'm told.' He said travelling along her bed 'I need to check you over, if you could sit up for me please.' After a second, Natalie reluctantly moved to raise herself, caught short as pain ripped through her causing her to gasp in agony and her head spun almost into darkness. 'Whoa,' said Dunlop gently supported her back and raised her slowly into sitting position and rest her back against the head board of the bed. He frowned slightly at the vast amount of pain Natalie seemed to be in.

Carefully Dunlop examined the cut on her temple, doing tests to ensure she wasn't still concussed nor had any memory issues. Then he looked at the bruise on her shoulder before asking her to raise her top for him. Shit, thought Natalie, she knew the bruises would be way out proportion for the chest of drawers alone. Seeing her hesitate Dunlop added 'It's nothing I haven't seen before' misinterpreting her hesitation for shyness. Even through her pain and panic Natalie still fought the urge to laugh. I don't think lifting my top is something I haven't done a million times before, thought Natalie bitterly. Slowly she raised her top level with her bra. She saw Dunlop's eyebrows rise slightly in surprise but fortunately after meeting her eyes briefly he lowered himself to examine them without comment. She breathed a slight sigh of relief as he moved from one to the other, pressing gently every now and then checking for any broken ribs.

After about twenty minutes he had finished his examination and allowed her to lower he top back down. Natalie watched him as he went to his computer, typing something she couldn't see. The he went into one of the cupboards and drew out a large packet and a fat bottle of some creamy liquid. Returning to her bed side he explained that the tablets were very strong painkillers and the cream was numbing cream, for the pain and to help bring out the bruises. Then he added 'Is there anything you would like to tell me?' Indicating her bruises. Shit, she thought.

'No sir,' Natalie said wearing an innocent expression. Dunlop still looked sceptical so she changed the subject 'So how long am I going to be in here?' She asked hoping she could milk her injuries. She wasn't keen on the idea of returning to the wing when she was so vulnerable.

'Oh you can go back on the wing now, you will need to take it easy with your work, but with nothing broken there isn't much reason for you to stay here.' He explained taking in Natalie's shocked expression. 'Unless,' he added perching on the edge of her bed 'There _is_ a reason you should avoid going back' he looked at Natalie a moment expectantly. She hesitated. Surely she should get Pat done for this, but wouldn't that land her in trouble too? Plus Pat might tell everyone that she had kissed her. Why does _that_ bother me? Thought Natalie, it meant nothing, why do I want to keep it private?

'No sir,' She said finally 'I'll…I'll go back on the wing' Sighing, Dunlop stood up and handed her the cream. Natalie took it and held out her hand for the drug packet, surprised when he didn't hand it to her. She meet his eye, quirking her eyebrow in question.

'Prison policy,' he answered 'Giving out large quantity of strong drugs is restricted. I'll give them to your personal officer to give to you in the necessary amounts.'

'In case I OD myself or something?' Natalie said sourly. Dunlop just smiled and called for an officer to take her back to the wing, explaining about the drugs and cream. Natalie followed the officer along the corridors, moving slower due to her stiffness of her bruises. As she walked she tried to figure out what to do next, her mind wondering around the Julies, how to make them pay, how she was going to keep safe in her current state. She had to share with Pat now, whether she liked it or not. Before she could stop herself her thoughts filled in how much more of Pat she would see sharing her cell. Quickly she shook off these thoughts, behave, she thought, why are even thinking about _that_? These thoughts continued to whirl round her head as she went to work.

…………………………………………………………………………………………

_Evening_

Kerrigan sniffed impatiently as she was patted down, feeling unease with the knowledge of what was coming. Officers had moved Natalie's stuff into her cell throughout the day, Natalie apparently being too injured to do it herself. Pat wasn't totally convinced, she wouldn't put it past Natalie to milk it. Then again, she thought, she had looked stiff at lunch, but maybe she too was worried about that night too. Pat couldn't fully explain her fear. Yes, Natalie was dangerous but her injuries would keep her at bay, yes she had snogged her but even if she tried anything on she would just reject the nonce, wouldn't she?

Natalie groaned as she caught her bruises again, some bloody painkillers, she thoughts bitterly as she clutched her burning ribs. She was trying to return the mop into the cupboard but it kept falling back out. Swearing she tried again to force it into the cupboard, letting out a cry as it fell again onto her again.

'Need help dear? Oh…' Julie S stopped as she rounded the corner realising it was Natalie. Julie J followed close behind, also stopping as she saw Buxton.

'I can manage thanks' Natalie muttered sulkily as she went back to the cupboard. Seeing her wince involuntarily in pain the Julies exchanged a hesitant look then moved forward to help.

'Here,' said Julie S taking the mop off Natalie and rearranging the other items in the cupboard before squeezing the mop in comfortably and closing the cupboard. Natalie pulled an irritated face, ruffled by her helplessness.

'Thank you' she said grudgingly. The Julies smiled kindly turning away. They were walking away before Natalie saw an opportunity. 'Hey, wait' She called after them 'I need a word with you two.' The Julies stopped in their tracks, panicking as Natalie caught up with them. This couldn't be good news. 'You two knew what Pat planned didn't you?' she demanded, taking an answer from their guilty expression. 'Well I need a favour' The Julies exchanged a worried look then turned back to Natalie.

'What kind of favour?' Julie S asked suspiciously, sure that it would not be good.

'Well you know that I now had to share with the psycho dyke,' begun Natalie, ignoring the Julies tutting at her phrase 'well my stash hole is now unavailable. Therefore I need you two to hide any stash that I get it. In your cell, the servery, I don't care, as long as I can get it when I need to.' She finished surveying the Julies as they took her demands in.

'So, we provide a hiding place for your stash, and then we are quits?' Julie S said slowly, unsure whether there was something hidden in this beneath the seemingly fair offer.

'I think it's a good offer for your forgiveness in plotting against me' Natalie eyes narrowed darkly at them 'Also, you can stay out of any more of Pat's bloody schemes.' She added watching them failing to disguise sheepish expression. 'So she _is_ planning?'

'Well…she hasn't got a plan that we know of' Julie J said carefully 'I don't think she has thought of anything'

'Not that you would tell me anyway' Natalie snapped 'So, do we have a deal?'

'No loopholes in that offer?' Julie S asked suspiciously when Natalie shook her head with a shrug of her shoulder 'Deal then.'

'Don't worry, I hardly think I'm in a state to hurt you' she grimaced down at her battered body 'Dearest Pat saw to _that_' she added bitterly

'Yes she told us all about your fight' Julie J said without thinking, flinching as she cursed herself for letting it slip. Being in the know was dangerous with Natalie and Pat.

'Really?' Natalie asked casually, her heart rate dramatically increasing, surely Kerrigan would have told them about the kiss 'What did she say?' she continued trying to keep her voice steady. Why did she even give a shit?

'Erm,' Julie J looked at Julie S for confirmation then added 'Just that you fought then you took an opportunity to run off'

'Oh' Natalie considered this. Pat hadn't told them about the kiss. Did that mean she thought it was private too? Or was she going to be using it as blackmail? _Blackmail?_ Why would she be able to_ blackmail_ me about it, thought Natalie, it meant nothing. Just as these thoughts spun round Buxton's head she head footsteps and looked round to see the brunette herself walking towards them.

It only took one glance at the three of them for Pat's ears to burn. As she approached them she thought she saw Natalie redden as she covered the side of her face in Pat's direction with her blonde hair. As it fell unevenly, Pat had the strange urge to move it back.

'If I didn't know better I would say you were up to something' Pat said quietly to the veil of blonde hair. The Julies looked between them, puzzled at the strange change in the atmosphere as Pat had approached them. Buxton blushing could be accounted for by the fact they had only just stopped talking about her. But something in her expression didn't add up.

'The Julies just told me what you told them about our fight' Natalie said, barely above a whisper as she snuck a glance round her hair to meet Pat's eye. Pat was surprised to see the gratitude in them, clearly thankfully to her for leaving out the intimate moment between them.

'Right…' Pat replied, holding Natalie's gaze before turning back to the Julies 'Bodybag wants you to clean the staff toilets on third corridor before lock up.' Out of the corner of her eye she saw Natalie continue to stare at her before adverting her gaze to the floor. Knowing Natalie was watching her so intently, Pat felt hot as her body blushed, thankfully invisible beneath her top.

'Oh, it always stinks in those ones; we think they are Bodybag's personal cubicles.' Julie J wrinkled her nose as she said this, both Julies heading off leaving Buxton and Kerrigan alone in the corridor. For a second neither spoke, unsure how to break the highly tense silence. Eventually it was Pat who spoke.

'So I guess you are in with me, unless you are planning another extreme stunt' she said chuckling darkly as they turned to walk towards the wing.

'Funny,' Natalie replied giving Pat evils 'Maybe I'll arm myself with a fire extinguisher this time, far less damaging to myself' as she winced as she knocked lightly against the banister. Pat couldn't help but smile at the joke as they climbed the stairs, facing away from Buxton to hide it. 'For now though' Natalie continued 'I don't have much option. I'm stuck with you' she paused to give Pat a quick look over.

After the officers had been round to lock up, Natalie laid on her bunk clipping her hair out of her face as Pat used the sink. Though she was supposed to be reading her magazine, she could help but sneak a look at Pat as she changed. She doesn't look _that _good, thought Natalie as she wondered her critical eyes over the brunette. Then again, she thought as she looked she couldn't help noticing the smoothness of Pat's skin, her eyes looking round the other woman's face, round her strong shoulders, despite herself also pausing to admire the unflaunted but still sizable cleavage. As her eyes wondered, so did her mind, especially as Pat lifted her sweater, pulling briefly with it the vest underneath, revealing an unexpected but surprisingly toned torso. Natalie couldn't suppress the quiet gasp that escaped her. Pat looked round at her, giving her a questioning look. Fighting off a blush at being discovered Natalie thought up the first thing that came to her head.

'Do you work out?' she inquired

'No' Pat replied, now very self conscious as she was aware of being watched.

'Then how the hell do you have that torso bitch? That's so unfair!' complained Natalie looking so much like a pouting child Pat had to smile. Natalie felt an odd jolt in her stomach as she saw Pat turn back to the mirror with that smile. Once Pat had finished she crossed to her bunk, discreetly removed her jeans and climbed in, rolling to face away from the wall.

Slowly Natalie rose from her bunk and moved to the sink. Pat watched as the blonde change and pull a tiny nightie over her knickers and bra, unable not to admire the view but feeling slightly guilty as she saw pain in Natalie's face when she made any contact with her bruises. As Natalie brought out the numbing cream and begun trying to massage it into her bruises with a flannel, but repeatedly gasping with pain. Eventually, Pat couldn't watch it anymore and grumbling climbed back out of her bunk and went to Natalie's side.

'Give it here' she muttered taking the bottle and the flannel off her, getting an annoyed noise in return. Moving closer Pat begun, starting on lowest bruises under Natalie's ridiculously short nightie on her torso. Gently, Pat massaged in the numbing cream, moving gradually upwards to level height. Natalie watched her as the other woman worked, looking so absorbed in it as she carefully manoeuvred over Natalie's bruises. As she moved up, Natalie reflected on how weird it was for Pat to be such a talented fighter, yet so gentle. Natalie was used to rough treatment, so she was unfamiliar with this kind of tender handling, especially from the one who had given her the bruises to start with.

Drawing up to Natalie's height, Pat finished applying the cream to her swollen shoulder, slowly she moved to the last one, on Natalie's temple. Softly she rubbed in the cream on the bruise surrounding the cut, Natalie automatically blinking as the flannel came close to her eye. As Pat did this, her eyes made contact with Natalie's, causing her to pause at the other woman's expression. Natalie was looking far less like the nonce Pat knew so well, but more like an innocent and wide-eyed child.

Suddenly Pat became very self-conscious of the fact they were both in their underwear, and she was standing so close to Natalie she could feel the heat from her body. Natalie stared into those shockingly blue eyes; sure that she could feel the same chemical explosions going on inside too, as she struggled to resist the urge to pull Pat into an even closer embrace. Seconds past as green eyes connected with blue, silently communicating their mutual need, unable to hide it.

'Snap,' Pat whispered weakly indicating her own bruised temple with Natalie's. For a second Natalie just stared, before understanding the brunette's meaning 'Now we match' Pat continued pulling away. Natalie smiled at the joke, sending shivers down Pat's spine. Natalie didn't move as Pat placed the cream down and she watched Pat climb back into bed. Then reluctantly she looked away from Pat, finishing at the sink, pulling her clip free of her hair. In the corner of her eye she could see Pat stare as her blonde hair fell around her shoulders. Pat rolled over to face the wall, feeling sheepish for the unexpected longing she had felt, and was still feeling. Wondering over, Natalie addressed her enemy's back.

'Pat,' she whispered her voice slightly higher than usual. Pat rolled back over nervous of what was to come, tensing as she saw how close Natalie stood looking down at her. Meeting her eyes, she mutely told Natalie to continue. 'Have you always been an orphan?' Natalie asked 'Just because I know you were in that St Paul's place' she added quickly unsure how Pat would respond.

'No, my family died in a car crash when I was five' replied Pat, blinking in surprise at how easily she had given away such personal details to the blonde. Must be the shock of the question, thought Pat. Natalie seemed to think so too, as her lips moved into a silent 'oh'.

'I'm sorry.' Said Natalie, suddenly feeling very awkward. Pat shrugged and continued.

'My parents and my sister, she was three.' Pat said, closing her eyes to stop herself from crying. She didn't want Natalie to see so she rolled away again.

'I'm sorry' Natalie repeated to her enemy's back, placing her hand on Pat's shoulder perching on the edge of her bed, now wishing she hadn't asked. 'Well…I wish I had never known my parents…They weren't the most caring.' She continued then Pat made a questioning noise 'Erm…Basically they saw me as a way to make money. Hence, over twenty years in the whore business.' Suddenly feeling dirty, she took her hand away. She sat on the edge of Pat's bed for a couple minutes before finally adding. 'I'll do you a deal Kerrigan.'

'Oh yer?' Pat turned round to face her having gathered herself. This couldn't be good. 'What would that be?' she asked warily.

'Don't look so cynical.' Natalie said with mock hurt in her voice, before smiling. 'Just thinking, we have to share this cell right?' Pat grunted agreement. 'And we want to be able to sleep at night.' Again a grunt in agreement. 'Then, how about we agree, no killing each other in the middle of the night? I mean, neither of us wants an undoubtedly extra fifteen years do we?' She looked down at Pat waiting for a reply.

'Fine' Pat mumbled sleepily.

'Deal?' Asked Natalie

'Deal.'

Username:2004206 Page: 6 11/05/2010


	4. Tender love

'Wake up Kerrigan!'

Thud. Pat groaned as the pillow hit her on the top of her head. Growling in the back of her throat she pulled her duvet over her head, muttering a swear word filled suggestion to her tormentor.

Natalie smiled as she threw the pillow back on her bed. Pat was not a morning person. Nearly three weeks of sharing her cell had told her that. And like most people who hate the morning, she grumbled continuously when awoken suddenly. She looks so funny when she's grumpy, Natalie thought absent-mindedly. 'Come on woman, or you'll miss your breakfast. We know how disastrous that would be.' Natalie smiled again. The only thing Pat hated more than lack of sleep was lack of food. Natalie still remembered the first time she meet her Pat had stolen her lunch. Furious at the time, but she now found it a rather endearing memory.

Eventually, a grumbling Pat emerged from beneath her covers. Shooting Natalie a deadly look she began gathering her clothes for the day. She knew Natalie had gotten used to being glared at first thing in the morning. The last three weeks had gone oddly smoothly, thought Pat, she had even semi forgotten she was meant to be planning Natalie's funeral. Looking at Natalie standing by the mirror reminded her of the first evening and the close call they had had. Shaking it from her mind she tugged on her boots. Natalie had applied her cream herself from then on, neither of them wanting to be in that situation again. Now Natalie's bruises had faded completely and she was making the most of it. I will never take for granted the ability to move without wanting to scream, vowed Natalie in her thoughts. She knew she wouldn't keep that promise but still.

Like everyday since they had started sharing they spoke more than previously to each other and far less brutal insults had flown between them. To Pat's relief, Natalie hadn't brought up her family again. Pat had worried for the first week that Natalie would use it against her, but for some reason she hadn't. Still, she thought, best be on my guard, you never know with Buxton.

Returning to the dining room for lunch, they shared a table. The others had gotten used to this strange change without commenting, at least to them. Natalie had overheard a couple of whispered conversations to begin with, most not in her favour. Many thought she was up to something, maybe trying to win the top dog over. Some thought she and Kerrigan were shagging, the thought of which caused her to blush and quickly go out of earshot of that particular conversation. To be honest she didn't know what she was up to. It was true, being in with the top dog when being runner up did mean she could have full control of the wing. With Pat's consent anyway. But for some reason she didn't want to use her new…friendship…if you could call it that. She was certain if she tried anything, Pat would be on her like a tonne of bricks. She didn't want to lose this friendship, even if she didn't want to admit it, it made prison far more bearable with someone to talk to.

'Do you have _any_ idea how many calories are in that Kerrigan?' Natalie remarked pulling a face whilst indicating Pat's massive bacon roll.

'No, but I'm guessing a lot. Your point?' Replied Pat. She was growing used to Natalie's comments on her diet, as it happened every mealtime. Natalie was such a typical fashion girl. From her obsession with calories, clothes and all things to do with her looks, she was in complete contrast with Pat's scruffy dress sense and large appetite. It suited Natalie though, thought Pat, as she couldn't imagine Natalie being any other way.

'How the _hell_ are you not obese? You eat _so_ much!' Natalie tutted shaking her head. 'And you are such a guy eating like that' she added as Pat scoffed.

'Again, your point?' Pat said muffled through her full mouth. As Natalie continued to shake her head Pat swallowed and said 'Would you prefer I eat lettuce and carrot sticks instead?' Her eyes teasing.

'Hell yes, rising at the crack of dawn, getting you doing laps in a pair of pink trackies' Natalie said picking up the joke. Pat pulled a face and they both smiled at the image of Pat wearing anything pink.

'Buxton, with that sadist approach you could rival Masterton' Pat said light-heartedly 'After all, you are her model con' she added playfully

'Don't remind me' said Natalie pulling a face 'I think she thinks I'm having a good influence on you, the opposite to her idea of the perfect con' she added smiling as Pat laughed. Pat had such a funny laugh, so more often than not she ended up giggling along with her, like now.

Returning to their cell Natalie smiled, how in the world had they gone from trying to smashing each other's skulls out to actually getting on quite well? Then again, they both had suffered blows to the head; Natalie chuckled quietly at this thought.

'What you smirking at Buxton?' Pat asked raising her eyebrows as she turned on the tap to fill her mug.

'Oh nothing' replied Natalie still unable to hide her smile.

'Liar' Pat replied mockingly narrowing her eyes at Natalie, who couldn't help but laugh.

'So cynical' said Natalie flicking some of the running water at Pat flirtatiously as she went by. As she crossed the room she was shocked to feel a cold trickling down her neck, turning she realised Pat had flicked a small handful of water back at her. Staring in mock outrage she quickly dodged round Pat and scoped a handful and quickly threw it down Pat's top.

'Aaah' Pat moaned as the chill reached her skin beneath her top. Frowning without heat she reacted the same way as they began hurtling water rapidly at each other, shrieking as each was hit by the chill. Suddenly Pat grabbed her water cup and emptied it over Natalie's head, drenching her hair and face.

'Aaaaah!' She shrieked as she felt how soaked she was. After recovering from shock she glared at Pat who was failing to resist giggling at Natalie's drenched state. 'You are _so_ going to die bitch' Natalie declared without heat diving for the mug. Just as they were wrestling over the mug, the door swung open and Bodybag stood in the doorway, staring opened mouthed at the two soaked women before pulling herself together.

'What in flaming Nora is going on?' She demanded looking between them. 'We thought someone was being killed in here. Stop acting like a flaming pair of kids, dry yourselves off and do something blooming useful for a change.' She finished glaring suspiciously at the women before turning and slamming the door behind her. For a couple of seconds neither said anything, staring after Bodybag before slowly both began cracking up.

Eventually both were doubled up from their laughter; every time they nearly stopped one would laugh at the other starting it over again. After a while they slowly managed to calm down and Natalie spoke.

'Do you still the look on Bodybag's face?' She gasped, still struggling for breathe 'I doubt she has ever laughed in her whole life.' She continued as her laugh finally subsided.

'Aww poor her, she looks like she needs one' Pat replied before glancing down at the pool of water still in the bottom of the sink. Natalie saw this and their eyes meet as Pat raised her eyebrows suggestively.

'No, no, no!' Natalie squeaked retreating rapidly as Pat moved as if to flick her again. Backing up Natalie caught her foot on a bag on the floor, and as she stumbled backwards she grabbed at Pat's wrist pulling her down along with her. Natalie landed flat on her back, Pat landing directly on top of her, her only face inches away from Natalie's. So close she could feel the change in the pace of breathing of the blonde woman as they both registered their rather suggestive position. For a second neither moved, both breathing slightly harder as they continued to stare into each other's eyes unsure how to react to the sudden rise in temperature. Natalie could feel Pat's thighs resting on her own, could feel her own heart racing where there wasn't an inch between them and she was sure Pat could feel it too. Pat stared into the face of the woman beneath her, swallowing slightly seeing the badly hidden longing on Natalie's face whilst batting with her own.

Pat quickly scrambled off Natalie, retreating back from where Natalie was laying with a torn expression. Trying to shake off the awkward atmosphere she grabbed a couple of towels, throwing one at Natalie who had just got back on her feet. Pat moved over to the stereo switching it on and playing a cd, trying desperately not to look at Natalie, whose eyes she could feel on her. Natalie turned away, scrubbing herself dry with the towel, her mind spinning with what just happened. She couldn't digest just how much she wanted Pat. She's a woman, thought Natalie, I. Don't. Like. Women. Or did she? Right now, she really didn't know. All she knew was she couldn't help but imagine what would have happened if Pat hadn't climbed off her.

Pat snuck a glance over her shoulder to where Natalie was turned away drying herself off, looking away quickly as Natalie raised her top revealing a lacy black bra. Pat hurriedly went back to drying herself, thinking desperately of a way to break the awkward silence between them knowing the music blasting out the stereo wasn't helping.

'Who's dying?' Pat jumped as she realised Natalie had come level with her, indicating the stereo as it sung 'break through the surface, reach for my hand' rather high pitched.

'Within Temptation' replied Pat taken aback.

'Sounds like someone dying' Natalie said pulling a face.

'Hey, they are awesome!' Pat said defensively before adding 'I'd like to see you sing like that!'

'I used to want to be a singer.' Natalie said absent-mindedly.

'Oh yer?' said Pat raising her eyebrow 'Why didn't you?' she asked.

'Because it was a stupid child's dream' snapped Natalie causing Pat to recoil slightly. 'Sorry, but it is. Besides my parents kept reminding me that people would run from me singing' she added bitterly. Pat frowned slightly at this revelation, curious to hear of Natalie's childhood. Somehow she struggled imaging her as an innocent little girl.

'Do you know any of these songs?' Pat indicated her cd pile. Natalie gave her a puzzled look before she scanned the backs of the packets.

'This one' she indicated one on a packet with a woman's face on the front. 'Is it the one with the music video where she falls off a building?' she asked.

'Bring me to life?' Pat asked 'Yes' she answered as Natalie nodded. 'Ok then' she continued taking the cd off Natalie placing it in the stereo and pressing play for the second song. 'Sing then.' She was shocked to see Natalie pale before backing away.

'N…no…I don't s...s…sing' Stuttered Natalie looking as if she was hyper ventilating. Backing away further she stared wide eyed between Pat and the stereo as it blast out 'How can you see into my eyes, like open doors…' Frowning Pat stopped the cd, looking curiously at the woman before her, unable to make sense of it.

'You suffer from stage fright?' She asked disbelievingly. Of all people, Natalie really didn't seem the type to be shy of anything.

'I just _don't_ sing.' Replied Natalie stiffly, slowly calming down from her panic. She glared at Pat, sure she was laughing at her for being so pathetic. She couldn't explain it herself, but something always clicked in her mind making her shake violently.

'What would I have to do for you to be able to?' Pat inquired carefully, now determined to see if Natalie's claim to being a terrible singer were valid. Natalie glared at her, knowing that she wouldn't give up.

'Disappear' she replied eventually faintly hoping Pat would leave it there. As expected, she didn't.

'Fine' she said climbing under her duvet covers on her bed and pressing play before disappearing completely beneath her covers. Natalie stared at the bulge in the covers, amusement underlying her fear as she looked back at the stereo. Drawing in a calming breathe and closing her eyes as she heard the first line approaching.

'How can you see into my eyes like open doors, leading you down into my core, where I've become so numb' she began keeping the fear just out of her voice. 'Without a soul, my spirit sleeping somewhere cold, until you find it there and lead it back home' she continued forcing herself to open her eyes and stare at a fixed spot on the wall opposite her. Beneath the covers Pat's jaw was hanging open, how the hell did she think she can't sing? She thought, she must be mental! Slowly she shifted from her hiding spot, seeing Natalie staring fixed on the wall. Just as the song got much louder Natalie's voice rose with it, the power in her voice easily reaching the notes Amy Lee sung.

Pat rose out of her bed staring open mouthed at the blonde woman who she could see visibly shaking as she sung with that amazing voice. As Natalie saw Pat appearing she stumbled slightly as she sung, just managing to hold it together, continuing to the end of the song as Amy Lee sung and held the final 'Bring me to life'. As she finished, Natalie looked startled at herself. She had never sung alone in front of someone before.

'Hey' said Pat softly as Natalie started shaking uncontrollably. 'I never knew you could sing like that! Your parents were lying bastards if they really told you that you couldn't sing.' She paused thoughtfully, an idea coming to her. 'Hey why don't you sing in that 'Prison Idol' thing they haven't stopped talking about?' she suggested.

'Are you mad?' responded Natalie panicking as a lump starting rising in her throat. 'I barely managed not having a nervous breakdown in front of you hiding out of view. Besides I can't even sing.' She declared turning away.

'Yes you can.' Shot back Pat, not letting this go.

'No, I can't' repeated Natalie 'You are just saying that because you are nice. Them lot' she indicated out the cell 'Will rip me to pieces.' She was shocked when Pat seized her shoulders swinging her round to face her.

'Look at me.' Ordered Pat 'You. Can. Sing.' She continued slowly 'Would I say you could if you couldn't?' she demanded. Natalie looked into her eyes, trying to detect her lying. Seeing nothing she concluded that she really did believe she could sing. She wasn't going to let it go, she was as stubborn as Natalie herself.

'Fine' she said eventually Pat letting her go 'One condition' she added quickly seeing an opportunity.

'Oh yer? What would that be?' Asked Pat cautiously, never sure about Natalie's deals.

'I get to borrow anything of yours when I want to. Clothes, shoes inclusive.' She stated. 'Deal?' As Pat giggled at the typical nature of Natalie's deal.

'Deal' she said laughing.

Username:2004206 Page: 6 18/05/2010


	5. Old flame still burns

As the cons filled the sits in front of the stage, Natalie felt her hands grow sweaty. She couldn't do this, she thought, she just couldn't. Different people had performed, Phyl and Bev, Tina and a couple of others who had been booed off because they had been terrible. Paling, Natalie thought, what if they do that to me? She and Pat had agreed that Pat would sign up to sing and that people would only realise it was going to be Natalie at the last second. As the last person finished singing Natalie felt panic rising rapidly, she knew Pat's name was about to come up, which meant her.

Pat next to Natalie and could sense the rising panic going on beside her. She hoped she could manage it. She hadn't said before, but if Natalie's fear got the better of her she would never live it down. Looking down at Natalie's clenched hand on her seat she fought off the urge to reach over and give it a comforting squeeze. She had never seen Natalie so afraid, only in the last few weeks she had seen another side to Natalie she thought as she watched the other woman. Hardly seems the same person, she was more vulnerable than she lets on, Pat thought, a bit like me.

As their teacher Vicky went forward to the microphone Natalie's eyes widened in terror. Pat shot Natalie a comforting glance as her name was read out. Going up to the stage she tugged Natalie to her feet dragging her with her.

'Actually, _I'm_ not going to sing' she announced over the speakers. 'I can't sing, but she _really_ can' indicating Natalie before leaving Natalie stood in front of the mic. Natalie stared into the crowd as panic washed through her. Her eyes darted around petrified and she looked round at the stereo as Vicky pressed play she looked back at the crowd. Seeing all eyes on her expectantly as the song started to play fear overwhelmed her and she bolted from the stage. Seeing this coming Pat sprung in front of her barring her way.

'Please…please…don't make me' stuttered Natalie her eyes darting around as she tried desperately to struggle past but Pat stood firm. The crowd started jeering as they realised just how terrified the previously invincible bitch was. Natalie blushed furiously as the humiliation burst through her.

'You want them to laugh Buxton?' demanded Pat, refusing to budge despite Natalie's struggles.

'No' replied Natalie sharply 'But I can't do this'

'Look, you run away now they will never let you live it down. You silence them with that voice of yours; you'll be a prison celebrity. Wait a second' Pat said turning to the women sitting in front of them. 'Everyone, stand at the very back' she ordered 'Now!' she shouted as people started complaining. Moving to the light switch she turned the back light off, making the women at the back almost invisible. 'You too miss' she said to Vicky. Replacing Vicky by the player she looked up at Natalie as she moved back in front of the mic. 'It's just me.' She said quietly so only Natalie could hear. She clicked the play button on the stereo. Natalie glanced at the back where slowly she was able to see the people's outline. Ignoring the fear building she fixed her gaze only on Pat as the first line started.

'How can you see into my eyes, like open doors' she sung into the mic focusing on Pat 'Leading you down into my core where I've become so numb,' she continued her fear slowly fading. 'Without a soul, my spirit sleeping somewhere cold, until you find it there and lead it back home.' As her confidence grew she snatched the mic from the holder and looked to the back as the chorus hit. 'Wake me up inside, wake me up inside, call my name and save me from the dark, bid my blood to run before I come undone, save me from the nothing I've become.'

As the song ended, she lowered the mic down as the crowd came rushing forward. The reality of what she had just done seemed to hit and she collapsed to the floor, sitting supporting herself on her hands. Head spinning she heard snatches of what people were saying.

'Why the hell is you scared for? You is a wicked singer' came the Caribbean accent of Darlene

'Wow, we never knew you could sing like that' Julie S said

'Good on ya girl' Julie J agreed. Slowly their words sunk in. They like my singing, thought Natalie dazed, they really did. A smile crept slowly on her face as she rose to her feet.

'You really think I can sing?' she asked, still unable to quite believe it.

'Are you joking? You could kill someone with the power of that voice!' Janine said, almost going green with envy. Natalie looked round at them all. They weren't lying she decided. Eventually she spotted Pat standing at the back of the crowd a mixture of smugness and pride was in her smirk. Letting out an ecstatic shriek Natalie leapt off the stage and threw herself at Pat wrapping her arms like clamps around her neck. The crowd laughed at Pat's shocked expression over Natalie's shoulder.

'Buxton, I need to breathe' Pat gasped through the limited windpipe she had. 'Blimey I only bullied you into singing, didn't give you a blooming kidney!' she said when Natalie loosened her grip and backed slightly away, still clinging tightly to Pat's shoulders.

'But if you hadn't I would be in for a life time's worth of piss taking' she replied with the broadest smile Pat had ever seen her wear. She now looked like the excitable little girl she must have once been. Realising she still clung to Pat she let go quickly and turned back to the rest of the wing who were chattering away about the revelation of Natalie's singing.

As the cons returned to the wing for lunch Natalie was chatting away all about her performance, possibilities of getting a contract, maybe being famous. Pat smiled as Natalie talked, finding this new side of Natalie incredibly funny. She quite liked it, she thought, maybe she isn't the pure and simple bitch she always acted. There just might be a decent person hidden beneath the surface.

'Just imagine it,' said Natalie 'Being able to go anywhere in the world, spend all day sunbathing on the beach without a care in the world' she continued dreamingly.

'Yep' Pat replied no longer fully listening.

'Sorry, I'm boring you' Natalie said reining in her chatter.

'No, I'm sure that would be great. Wouldn't be my thing but I'm sure you would enjoy getting a sun tan' she said 'Maybe get a couple of local men to apply your sun tan before having a full flung holiday fling' she added not fully disguising a slightly bitter note.

'Oh no thanks to the holiday flings had enough flings for a lifetime. Think I need something more satisfying.' Natalie revealed surprised at Pat's bitter tone. Was she jealous? Thought Natalie hopefully.

'A committed one week affair then' Pat replied chuckling.

'I expect we'll find one for you too' Natalie responded giggling carefully trying to either confirm or reject the idea of Pat being jealous. Pat just looked both shocked and amused at that comment.

'I didn't realise I was invited.' Pat said surprised 'I thought you would want to get away as fast as possible.'

'Don't know me as well as you think then do you?' Natalie said smirking over her drink 'Besides, if I'm all famous then an extra plane ticket will be nothing.'

'Oh. Right.' Muttered Pat quietly. An awkward silence descended briefly before Natalie continued her long winded description of her plans for success. As she chatted Lou Stokes approached Pat, looking slightly troubled. When Pat spotted this, her smile faded.

'Yes miss?' Pat asked in response to Lou hesitation. For a moment Lou said nothing, unsure how to continue, she wasn't sure what Pat's reaction would be. Eventually as she could see worry building in Pat's eyes she spoke.

'You have a visitor.' She said.

'I didn't send a VO.' Replied Pat looking puzzled.

'No, but I thought you might want to see this visitor.' Lou replied, knowing the next question was unavoidable. 'It's Miss Williams, Kerrigan.' She answered before it was asked.

'Sheena' whispered Pat, barely able to believe it. After all this time…She rose, emptying her tray before following Lou. She didn't even look back, or she would have seen the look of pain that was etched across Natalie's face.

She stared after where Pat had gone, feeling as though her world was being torn down. As emotion tore through her, threatening to overpower her she emptied her tray quickly and ran to her cell as fast as she could without attracting attention. The moment the door closed behind her, her sobs took over and she slid down the door tears soaking her face.

As she wept her shoulders shook with the force of her tears, her mind unable to shake the look of love in Pat's eyes as she said the name of her ex-lover. What had she expected? It was her darling druggie lover, Natalie thought bitterly, had she really thought she meant that much to Pat? Of course not, don't be stupid, she thought, Pat would never look like that at the mention of _me_. What am I? Yes she could sing but in the end she was just a nonce, she whimpered as that thought came to her mind. Just a nonce. That was all she would ever be.

When her sobs had subsided, she got up off the floor and wiped her eyes with her sleeve. Approaching her sink she quickly fixed her smudged make up and added some extra. If that was how it was going to be, she thought defiantly, then so be it. Might as well live up to it. She'd show Pat how much she cared, Natalie thought as she left her cell, swinging the door closed behind her.

Pat walked into the visiting room, barely able to keep breathing. The woman she loved, the one she had thought she had lost forever, had come back to her, at long last. Seeing the taller woman sitting before her, her pulse quickened and she wanted to cling to her and never let go. She tried to speak but all that escaped her lips was a quiet whimper.

'Shh' Cooed Sheena as she embraced Pat; taking in the scent she had missed. For a minute neither broke apart, until Bodybag made an interrupting coughing noise implying they end their hug before retreating to the opposite wall. Sitting down opposite one another at the visiting table Pat stared into her ex-lover's eyes, unsure where to start. Instead Sheena spoke first.

'I've missed you' she whispered, a single finger tracing a line down Pat's face from her temple to her chin. Pat gulped back a sob as the redhead's touch brought back all the memories of their night together. Sheena seemed to be thinking about it too, as she smiled softly.

'What kept you?' Pat demanded, wanting Sheena to know the emotionally torture she had been through, waiting for her and being repeatedly disappointed. Sheena hesitated, looking away at the floor before looking back and speaking.

'Dylan's not been very well. Been struggling to keep custody of him.' Said Sheena quietly.

'All this time?' Pat replied bitterly, knowing there was something wasn't right. Sheena was unnaturally pale, sickly even. Dark circles were under her eyes and she it looked to Pat like she had lost weight.

'Pat…' murmured Sheena reaching across the table to take Pat's hand, but Pat snatched it away. 'I'm sorry' Sheena cried desperate for Pat's help.

'What did you come back for Sheena? Me?' Pat demanded suspiciously not read to believe it and trying so hard not to cry, especially as Sheena was also on the verge of breaking down.

'Of course, I've been lost without you.' Sheena whispered. This time as she reached across, Pat let her take her hand. Looking down Pat noticed a tiny prick just under Sheena's sleeve. Roughly she pushed her sleeve up, ignoring Sheena's protests.

'What's this?' Pat shouted 'Back on the smack? What about Dylan?' Sheena didn't reply, just stared at the floor as tears went down her cheeks.

'I'm sorry…I…I couldn't cope. It's the only thing keeping me going.' She whimpered eventually. Pat stared at her ex-lover, no longer seeing the strong woman she had once known. All she saw was a wreak. Slowly she moved around the table, putting her arms around Sheena, holding the crying woman close. Gradually she stopped crying and looked up at Pat steadily.

'I need you. I love you. You still love me right?' Sheena asked, voice questioning in a tone Pat didn't like. She couldn't help but hesitate as the voice reminded her of the tone people use when they are about to ask a massive favour. Seeing her hesitate Sheena added squeakily 'Is there someone else?' she stared up at Pat eyes wide.

'Don't be silly. I don't do relationships.' Pat replied scowling, even as her thoughts wondered back to the wing, feeling a prang as she remembered who she had left abruptly at lunch.

'You've said that before.' Sheena looked sceptically up at Pat silently holding her gaze. 'I'm broke' she whimpered eventually. 'They are threatening to take Dylan away' she added pleadingly and Pat finally got it. Moving away as if Sheena was something diseased, she looked disgusted as she resumed her original seat.

'So that's what you came in for. To ask for some money cuz you spent all yours getting off your head.' She muttered darkly, feeling almost sick. The woman who had meant so much to her now only wanted to see her to fuel her habit.

'No!' cried Sheena 'I came in because I needed to see you. You are everything to me. The smack, it's only because I miss you so much.' Sheena continued.

'So basically you expect me to fund your habit for fifteen years, maybe more while you and your son starve?' said Pat bitterly as she felt like her heart was being broken all over again. Sheena didn't reply, looking at the floor as she quietly started crying again. Pat shook her head in disbelief rising out of her seat to leave. Sheena looked up quickly, her eyes pleading.

'Pat please!' she begged, reaching across to clutch Pat's wrist. Pat looked round at her, just for a second before pulling away.

'No Sheena.' Was all that was needed to be said. An officer took hold of Sheena pulling her away as Bodybag opened the door for Pat to leave. As the door closed behind her, Kerrigan couldn't contain it anymore, breaking down in sobs leaning against the wall for support.

'Come on' snapped Bodybag realising Pat wasn't following. Returning to the con's side she was startled to see Kerrigan in pieces. 'Hush now' said Bodybag more softly 'There is no point crying over split milk.' Slowly Pat pulled herself together and walked along with Bodybag back to the wing.

Username:2004206 Page: 6 20/05/2010


	6. Jealous tendencies

Natalie carefully watched the male worker from her spot in the garden. After only ten minutes observation she could tell he was single, from the way he had looked over every woman who had gone near him. Clearly frustrated, she thought sourly, easy target. Plus he was very good looking, being seen with him would make anyone jealous, she thought. She had spotted a tattoo on the back of his neck under his hair line, a date from a few years ago. Obviously a proud father, another thing she could use when she charmed him. She was so experienced on charming people, this would be too easy. Wondering over, she quickly got to work.

Pat walked into the garden, barely even acknowledging that everyone had gone quiet when she arrived. Clearly it had spread she had had a visit from Sheena. Time to let go, she thought sadly as she started working quietly on the plants that were soon to be ready to harvest. Glad to have something to distract her she concentrated on the treating the plants carefully. She didn't even notice that Buxton wasn't anywhere to be seen.

Forcing a flirtatious smile Buxton tucked her fingers in the worker's belt loops. She had managed to start a conversation by fakely admiring his tattoo, leading to him talking endlessly about his daughter; it had been long and very boring. But she had smiled and nodded in the right places, slowly edging closer to him. Finally he seemed to get the idea, reaching in to kiss her. The urge to pull away from his rough mouth almost won over but she forced herself to continue. She had lots of practice pretending to enjoy herself when she really wasn't. Pulling away she looked suggestively at the storage shed before moving towards it, gesturing him to follow. She had picked this place for a reason; she knew it was only a matter of time before they would be called back in…

…..

Pat gathered her tools, looking round frowning finally noticing that Buxton wasn't there. Walking to the storage shed she froze as she heard a familiar giggle from within followed by a very masculine grunt. Her blood ran cold as she grabbed the handle, swinging the door open more forcefully than necessary staring into the scene she had known was there before she even saw it. Inside the shed Natalie was leant against a wall, some guy nuzzling her neck, his hand firmly hooking her thigh up against his waist. Realising he was being observed, the man quickly released Buxton, turning round to face Pat, a worried look on his face at being discovered. Pat felt fury flow through her, struggling to resist the urge to run her pinch fork into him or at least beat him senseless. Instead she just glared at him before she looked over his shoulder to meet Natalie's pretend innocent eyes before throwing her tools into the tool bucket and storming away.

Pat reached the entrance to the prison, still fuming from what she had just seen. What had she expected? She thought furiously, that's who Buxton was. A whore and a nonce, had she really thought she had changed? She could shag who she liked, it's not as if I care, thought Pat bitterly knowing from the hurt she was feeling that she was lying. She had let the bitch inside her head when she should have known better. Pat felt Natalie's presence behind her in the line but refused to look round at her, unsure she could control her rage if she did.

Walking back to the wing, Natalie carefully watched Kerrigan's back wondering what she was thinking. She had looked angry enough when she had seen her in the shed, so surely that meant she cared? But she has her druggie lover back now. Thought Natalie hurt bubbling up inside. Besides she thinks I'm a whore thought Natalie cringing slightly. But I am, always have been, why should I care what she thinks? Thought Natalie. Neither of them exchanged a word as they climbed the stairs towards their cell. In the cell Pat continued ignoring Natalie, which caused Natalie to get more and more agitated as she watched her. Eventually she couldn't bear the silence.

'How was Sheena?' she asked as casually as she could manage, not fully disguising the resentment she felt. Pat paused, unsure whether to acknowledge this conversation. She didn't feel like talking to the bitch, let alone about another one. She turned slowly to face Natalie. In the end she simply shrugged ambiguously, unsure as to the point to that question. 'So when is the happy couple's wedding?' continued Natalie the bitter edge to her tone causing Pat to frown in confusion.

'What are you on about?' Pat snapped irritated at the return of the bitchy side of Natalie. Then again, she thought sourly, that is the only real side to Buxton. She had been stupid to think there was any other side to her.

'Well you had a visit from her right? Celebrating her return with a good old quickie I'm guessing.' Natalie replied with her old air of arrogance.

'No. I think I'll leave the quickies to you.' Pat said sharply unable to control the anger pumping round her system. 'Bet you didn't even know that guy's name.'

'You know, I never thought to ask' shot back Natalie arrogantly. 'Still, I would have thought wedding plans would be more on your mind' she added

'There is no sodding wedding.' Snapped Pat 'I'm having nothing to do with that bitch or funding her frigging habit.'

'Oh.' Said Natalie quietly. The pain in Pat's face made her want to hold her close, longing to comfort her. 'I'm sorry.' She said softly, unsure what that meant for her. If it even changed anything.

'What's it to you?' Pat challenged forcefully. When Natalie didn't answer she added sarcastically 'What about that guy, maybe you should plan your wedding to him'

'I don't think so somehow.' Natalie replied 'It didn't mean anything.'

'Of course not, quickie in the prison shed. I expect you had half the bloody male staff in there Buxton' replied Pat bitterly, jealousy flowing through her veins. Natalie flushed, whether in anger or embarrassment Pat didn't know.

'What's it to you?' She shot back hotly her face reddening. That's what Pat thought of her. Worse, it was true she thought pain almost consuming her. She needed out from this. Turning away she rummaged through her sock draw, finding the small hit in a little plastic bag she had taking from the Julie's hiding place. Pulling it out of her sock draw she stormed towards the sink.

'What are you doing?' demanded Pat stepping in the way and grabbing Natalie's wrist inspecting the couple of tablets in the little bag.

'Nothing to do with you' snapped Natalie snatching her wrist back and trying to push past Kerrigan.

'Don't be stupid' barked Pat attempting to snatch the bag of Natalie. After a couple minutes anger fuelled struggling Natalie pushed Pat back roughly before her emotions burst out.

'Stop acting as if you give a shit!' She shouted her eyes welling up despite her determined efforts to stop it. 'After all, I'm only a nonce' she yelled her voice cracking over the word neither had used for weeks 'That's all I'll ever be isn't it?' Staring at Natalie, everything suddenly clicked in Pat's brain. Before she knew what she was doing she grabbed Natalie by her shoulders, kissing her hard on the lips.

The feeling of Pat's lips on hers acted like a crack of a whip on Natalie. Dropping the plastic bag her arms wrapped like clamps round Pat's neck kissing her back passionately. Slowly Pat loosened her grip on Natalie shoulders lowering her hands to her waist pulling her even closer until there wasn't a hair width between them. Pat kissed Natalie hungrily; unable to listen to the warnings in her head telling her this was a bad idea. All that matter was she had her now, for this moment at least she was hers. Kissing just as hungrily, Natalie's mind span, this was heated yet somehow so tender. She wanted more, so much more. She longed to push Pat down on the bed, take all of her now. But she held back, not wanting to rush but to savour it, for Pat to believe this was more than just that. Far more. Still, she tested the waters gently nudging Pat's lips with her tongue, delighted when Pat brought her tongue out to meet it. Gradually Pat's hand slid up from Natalie's waist, slowly cupping her breast. Natalie moaned into Pat's mouth, shocked by the gentle touch heat rushing down between her legs. She wanted more, needed more…

A knock on the door snapped them both back into reality. Jumping apart the door swung open to reveal Tina standing there. Pausing at the unexplained yet obvious tension, she looked between the two women. Pat fidgeted awkwardly with her hair, looking away as she blushed slightly. Natalie glared at Tina, tempted to throttle her for interrupting. When Tina didn't say anything Natalie grew impatient.

'Did you want something O'Kane or just admiring the view?' She snapped frustrated.

'Oh…erm…' Tina stumbled 'The Julies need a hand in the servery' She said addressing Pat before retreating out the cell. Without looking at Natalie, Pat quickly followed.

Username:2004206 Page: 3 28/05/2010


	7. Giving in

Natalie lay in bed, her thoughts full of that day. Pat hadn't come back until the last second before lock up. Neither of them had spoken, though it was clear what they were both thinking about. Now they were both in their beds, the lights had gone out. Damn Tina, thought Natalie furiously. She had finally got a taste of what she thought would never happen, and like all addictive drugs, she wanted more. She needed more. Letting out a frustrated sigh she rolled over to face towards the side of the cell Pat was sleeping facing the wall. Whether she liked women as a whole or not she didn't know. All she knew was she'd wanted Pat from the moment she had first kissed her. To have gotten so god damn close now being back to where she had started was maddening. She was all worked up now, she felt wasted. There was no way she would sleep tonight while she was this wound up. She needed satisfying and if she wasn't going to help, thought Natalie looking at Pat's back, she would have to do it herself. Listening carefully to Pat's steady breathing, confirming she was asleep, Natalie slid off her underwear.

…..

Pat had fallen asleep quickly, being practised at making the most of available sleeping time at the orphanage yet to be in a light enough sleep to wake if in danger. The priest tended to leave you alone if you were already asleep, but you never knew. She hadn't wanted to stay awake with such a tense atmosphere. Now though she realised she was awake, shifting slightly she quickly realised she wasn't the only one still awake. Pausing she listened, opening her eyes slowly to look at her wall. She knew what that kind of heavy breathing meant. Her eyes widening she rolled silently to face into the cell before lifting herself into sitting position. She could only see a very faint outline of Natalie but listening carefully she confirmed her original thought. As she heard Natalie starting to moan quietly she couldn't help but feel herself stirring in her underwear.

Without knowing why, Pat rose silently out of her bed slowly crossing the cell. Natalie was clearly getting there as her moans got more laboured, Pat's own stirring heightening, knowing that the other woman was close. Cautiously approaching she could now see Natalie's face, her eyes closed, her expression of arousal causing a massive twitch in Pat's underwear. Suddenly Natalie groaned, clearly climaxing before moaning a single syllable 'Pat…' Pat jumped back into the darkness; the mention of her name making her sure Natalie had noticed she was there. Realising that her name was being used for a whole different reason only caused her too feel even more heated below.

Slowly Natalie came down from her climax, feeling better than before but still very frustrated. She had been surprised how fast fantasizing about Pat had got her there. Opening her eyes she looked under her covers for her underwear.

'Enjoying yourself there?' Pat's voice came suddenly from the darkness causing Natalie to shriek in shock. How long had she been there? Thought Natalie quickly.

'What the hell you doing scaring me like that for?' She said fiercely, blushing furiously knowing what she had been doing only moments before.

'Nothing in comparison to you' replied Pat, her heart racing now she had revealed what she had seen, and heard. She could feel each beat between her legs, her heat spreading, more than she wanted to admit. Natalie was silent a moment in shock at this revelation, glad Pat couldn't fully see her blushing.

'I don't know what you are talking about' she replied her voice going slightly higher than usual.

'You said my name.' Pat said so softly Natalie only just heard her. Natalie's heart started racing even faster; she knew how much she wanted her now.

'You are imagining things' said Natalie a bit too sharply, trying to discreetly find her underwear. Pat still saw, seeing a moment to prove it. Quickly she lifted Natalie's duvet up, revealing both the fact she wasn't wearing underwear and her arousal. Both froze, Natalie at her exposed state as Pat stared down at her wetness. For a second neither moved, before primal instinct took over Natalie. Growling in the back of her throat she grabbed Pat by the scruff of her tank top pulling her onto the bed before Natalie climbed on top of her kissing her fiercely on the mouth. Her brain hazy from the speed of what was happening and her desire, Pat at first kissed back before fully realising what she was doing. Twisting her hips roughly she dismounted the blonde woman before she scrambled half off the bed. Natalie made a desperate noise of protest, she had lost all restraint, all control now. Staring at the other woman Pat nearly moaned at the unrestrained desire in Natalie's face. Pat's mind told her to walk away, this woman was dangerous, and she had destroyed so many lives with her manipulative ways. But looking at the desperate longing in Natalie's face told her she wasn't being manipulative right now, she needed her.

Disobeying her mind, Pat's instinct took over; she swiftly lifting Natalie's nightie off in one fluid movement climbing on top of Natalie she kissed her hard on the mouth and pushing two fingers straight into her. Natalie moaned into Pat's mouth as she entered her with more force then she had expected. She couldn't think, her mind spinning with the passionate yet tender kiss Pat was so good at and as Pat started to move inside her she couldn't restrain the gasps and moans that came out her mouth into Pat's. As Pat moved harder inside her, her other hand gently moved over the rest of Natalie's body. Even as Natalie's heat mounted she felt shivers from the attention the rest of her body was getting. Reaching her climax Natalie broke the kiss as her entrance contracted hard on Pat's fingers, arching her back and letting out a loud moan.

Pat withdrew her hand, gently kissing Natalie's neck and before Natalie could react she slid down the length of her body. Feeling Pat's tongue enter where her fingers had just left removed any restraint Natalie had left.

'Pat' she moaned as the brunette's skilful tongue flicked at her clit. Pat blushed as Natalie continued moaning her name, the pitch of Natalie's voice heightening in time with Pat's tongue as it slowly starting moving faster and firmer. Hearing Natalie moan and feeling her arousal heightening Pat felt her own heat rising. Natalie panted as she felt herself getting hotter and hotter, waves of pleasure sending shivers through her body. As she came Natalie's hips jerked out of control nearly sending both her and Pat flying if it wasn't for Pat's firm grip on her hips. As Pat felt Natalie climax she felt such a rush down below she swore she might cum too. Just knowing she was the cause of such pleasure made her almost moan in delight.

Natalie felt her body relax as she came down from her climax; she panted savouring the immense feeling of satisfaction that coursed through her body. Pat came back up her body pausing to kiss her stomach before kissing her gently on the lips. Natalie wrapped her hands round Pat's still infuriately covered shoulders, running a finger under the straps. Pat seemed to get the idea as she sat up lifting her tank top over her head. Pausing just a moment to admire the view above her Natalie ran a hand slowly over the brunette's toned torso before gripping her hips to switch positions. Pat landed gently on the mattress, surprised at both the slow pace and the gentleness of the blonde woman. She wasn't sure if she wanted more of the slow and gentle or if she wanted Natalie to get on with it.

Smoothly Natalie unclipped Pat's bra and slipped off her underwear, the whole time kissing Pat gently but hungrily on the lips. She wanted to do more, so much more but forced herself to hold back. She needed Pat to know this wasn't just sex, it was far more. After a couple of minutes she broke the kiss, moving painfully slow down Pat's neck. At the base she resisted the urge to bite down hard, she didn't think Pat would appreciate it. Instead she bit lightly on some skin, sucking it a bit before moving on. Lowering to Pat's chest she slowly flicked her tongue around Pat's nipples rewarded with a small moan. She wanted to continue teasing; caressing but the impatient shifting of Pat's hips told her this wasn't the time. She needed it now. Lowering herself down to Pat's thighs she gave one more teasing lick to Pat's inner thigh before finally entering into the brunette.

Pat moaned in pleasure as she finally got what she wanted. She felt shots running through her body as her hips began to jerk out of control. Every now and then she felt so close to coming yet then Natalie seemed to hold back, not allowing her to quite get there. After this happened several times Pat grew impatient, her body glistening with sweat from her incredibly high arousal.

'Please' she whispered her eyes almost rolling. Natalie paused momentarily, shocked by this display of vulnerability. Then with a slight smile she finally took mercy on the other woman, pushing her tongue deep into Pat hitting just the right spot forcing Pat over the edge. Pat came with such force it felt like the earth shattered around her as she couldn't stop a low scream escaping her lips. Now she knew why Natalie had kept her just off climaxing. She had built her up for the hardest orgasm Pat had ever experienced. Natalie felt Pat's body relax under her as she kissed her way back up her body.

Drawing level with her and rolling off to lie beside her, Natalie looked down at the exhausted face, smiling fondly at her. Natalie loved the powerful feeling she felt in bed, knowing how good she could make the other feel if she chose. She was a bit obsessive over control for good reasons…but she brushed those thoughts aside. She didn't want to ruin the immense feeling of satisfaction she was experiencing right now. Besides she wasn't done yet.

Lowering her mouth to Pat's she slowly kissed life back into her. Moving back onto her Natalie felt the electricity where their bare skin contacted. Gently Natalie allowed her hands to wonder, caressing every inch of Pat's body. Pat's eyes fluttered open and she looked up into Natalie's face, part of her numbed mind still wondering how she had ended up in bed with this woman. Feeling Natalie's hand begin to lower down towards her heat Pat groaned slightly before reaching down and taking Natalie's hand away.

'Not…sure I can take more' she breathed in answer to Natalie's questioning look. A smile touched Natalie's face and Pat knew she was revelling in the knowledge of her skills.

'I'll go easy on you' breathed Natalie in reply, whispering softly into Pat's ear. All Pat could do was whimper softly in reply. Lowering her hand Natalie gently pressing into Pat, the wetness easily took in her finger. Kissing Pat just as softly on the lips she moved inside her, slowly but firmly. Pat sighed in satisfaction, glad of the slow pace as her exhausted body lay useless beneath Natalie. After only a short time Natalie climaxed her, though this time it was nowhere near as powerful, but just as fulfilling.

Withdrawing her hand Natalie rolled off Pat, now fully fulfilled sleep beckoned. Reaching across she pulled Pat's arm around her as she rolled to face away. Sighing happily she settled, she didn't know what this would mean in the morning, if it would mean anything at all. But for now, everything was perfect. Pat wrapped her arm more tightly around the blonde woman pulling her close to her. She still couldn't quite get her head round she was in bed with Buxton. She had just had unbelievable amazing _sex_ with her. In the back of her mind she was warring, knowing she must be completely out of her mind. But she pushed the thought away, breathing in Natalie's smell before finally giving in to sleep.

Username:2004206 Page: 4 28/05/2010


	8. Blast from the past

As Natalie woke in the morning she groggily realised from the feeling of her duvet on her bare skin she was naked, moments later registering she wasn't alone in her bed. Rolling over she saw Pat lying naked next to her still deep in sleep. The night before came back in a rush to her, and she fidgeted embarrassed at the memory. Looking over the pale face she wondered what would happen now. Surely without Sheena last night meant that Pat was hers? Then again she thought bitterly, she had many good nights that meant nothing. Besides, she was still a nonce and she knew how much Pat hated that.

Eyes stinging from that thought Natalie rolled to face away from Pat. Feeling movement Pat's eyes flicked open, blinking a few times to confirm to herself she wasn't going mad. She really was in bed with Buxton. Immediately she felt torn by the mix of emotions she felt. Last night had been amazing. For both of them. Yet she couldn't suppress the knowledge of where Buxton must have got her experienced touch from. How many people had she been with before? Thought Pat, sure she didn't want to know. Cringing Pat pulled away, climbing out of Natalie's bed to search for her clothes. She could sense that Natalie was already awake but didn't look at her even as she heard her roll over to face her. Once fully dressed she couldn't help but look across at the blonde woman who was just sitting up.

Pat winced slightly at Natalie's expression; she had wanted it to be the cruel and cunning expression she had hated so much so it would be easier to discard. Instead she had seen a bad attempt at indifference failing to disguise a mixture of hurt and sadness. Pat fought an urge to go and comfort Natalie, to hold her close let her know how much she meant to her. She just couldn't. Whatever had happened last night didn't change the amount of pain Natalie had inflicted on others. Who knew, maybe this really it had been just a day on the job for her. Besides, thought Pat, I don't do relationships. Especially with nonces.

Natalie had watched Pat dress in silence, trying hard to look indifferent. She didn't want Pat to know just how much she was hurting. Natalie had learnt early in her career, you don't let people see that they have the power to hurt you. It was bad business. Seeing Pat turn away, looking for something to do until unlock as Natalie slowly moved to get dressed. Feeling Pat's eyes on her naked body Natalie was surprised that she cringed, embarrassed for some reason. Twitching slightly she felt very exposed, she wanted to hide from Pat, her nakedness making her feel vulnerable and dirty.

Time passed very slowly in the tense atmosphere, both woman waiting desperately for unlock, the chance to escape this painful silence. Natalie was taking her time getting ready, milking the time it took to sort her hair and make up so she wouldn't end up with nothing to do. Pat watched Natalie closely from her bed, thinking despite herself that Natalie was incredibly beautiful with her soft blonde hair and dark green eyes. I think that, thought Pat bitterly, along with half the frigging blokes in England. Maybe the frigging world. Finally unable to milk it anymore, Natalie finished at the sink turning to see Pat staring at her. Holding each other's gaze for a moment both felt extremely awkward, their thoughts on the night before. The moment passed as both looked away trying desperately to reduce the tension.

Finally the cells were unlocked, Natalie leaving the cell as quick as a flash unable to bear the awkward silence a second longer. Once she collected her breakfast she looked around, seeing only one empty table. Knowing Pat would probably sit there she glanced around before approaching a table with Janine and Darlene sitting on it.

'May I join you?' Natalie enquired in a strangely polite tone. Darlene and Janine exchanged a puzzled look at this nature of this strange request, and at the usually polite tone.

'Alright' Janine asked after a second. Sitting down Natalie began playing with her breakfast, very aware when Pat went and sat at the empty table that everyone was staring between them. Everybody could tell something had happened, even if they didn't know what. Janine stared at Natalie's distant expression, wondering what in the world could possibly rattle Buxton's super thick cage. Glancing over at Kerrigan, Janine's curiosity heightened almost getting the better of her. She restrained herself though; she had long learnt not to get on the wrong side of Natalie. Even if she had been far more likable in the last few weeks, Janine sensed the return of a very violent Natalie. Natalie glanced up at Janine immediately irritated at the nosy expression at the obvious tension. This was going to be a long day, Natalie concluded wearily.

………………………………………………………………………………………..

'Pat? Could you come and help us back her?' Called Julie J from the back of the servery. Pat's head jerked up, she had been far away a certain blonde playing centre role in her thoughts. They had been avoiding each other like the plague, neither being able to stand the awkwardness. People hadn't commented, much to Pat's happiness though she was sure they had noticed, especially the Julies. Signing she shock herself before walking out to the back.

'Yer?' Said Pat as she approached the Julies. They needed help shifting a potato sack so Pat reached down to help, their combined strength carrying the potatoes to the prep area. Setting it down all three women stretched out after this task. As Pat stretched upwards Julie S suddenly shot towards her.

'What's this?' She demanded indicating a small round mark on Pat's neck, almost invisible beneath her hair. Pat cringed, remembering Natalie gently sucking her neck. She was glad Natalie hadn't bitten down hard; it would have been harder to hide.

'What?' Pat asked trying her best to seem ignorant. It had been a long shot but as expected the Julies didn't buy it.

'Don't treat us like idiots Pat.' Snapped Julie S, Julie J moving closer to Pat, staring at the mark on her neck.

'It's nothing.' Replied Pat. The Julies seemed to pick up on her shame, as they looked between each other than at Pat looking shocked.

'That was _her_ wasn't it?' said Julie S looking disgusted. Nobody needed to explain who 'her' was. Unknown to them Natalie had just approached the door, hiding out of sight when she realised the conversation going on within. When people said 'her' in that tone it was almost always in reference to her. She had learnt that with her girls from the continent. 'It was, wasn't it?' continued Julie S 'That's why you both have been avoiding each other.'

'I said its nothing' replied Pat sharply, not wanting to go into the details of last night. Out of sight Natalie cringed, wondering how much the Julies knew.

'Getting a hickey from a nonce is nothing is it?' Said Julie J exasperated. Seeing Pat shift uncomfortably both Julies realised, that was just the tip of the iceberg. 'You slept with her?' The Julies said in unison both of their mouths hanging open they took their answer from Pat's sheepish expression. 'How could you Pat?' asked Julie J feeling sick 'You know everything she's done, all those poor kids or have you forgotten all that?' she demanded.

'Of course I haven't.' Pat snapped 'It won't happen again.' She declared. Out in the corridor Natalie felt her eyes sting. Just as I thought, she thought bitterly, just used for a good one night stand then dumped. Just like always.

'Why did it happen at all?' asked Julie S 'You do realise she won't let it go? She'll be using it against you forever now. Seriously Pat how could you be so stupid!'

'I don't know' said Pat so quietly Natalie struggled to hear her. The Julies exchanged a look, unnerved by the clear attachment Pat felt. 'Maybe I stupidly thought she might not be as bad as we thought.'

'Blimey Pat, the manipulative bitch has even got to you!' said Julie S exasperated.

'I dunno Ju,' said Julie J suddenly 'I mean yer I know all the kids etc but last few weeks you gotta admit, she has been acting half weird.' Pat looked between them, unsure what to think. 'For one,' Julie J continued 'She hasn't stopped staring at you when you are not looking' she said indicating Pat.

'And when she knew about our involvement in your plan to get her caught she only got us to hide her stash' Julie S said thoughtfully. Natalie frowned outside; they didn't know Pat had tried to kill her? She thought bemused, left that bit out did ya Pat?

'She didn't half look scared when she was up on stage yesterday' continued Julie J 'I don't think that was an act.' She concluded.

'But still! What in the world made you go near her?' Asked Julie S coming back from her thoughts sharply.

'I don't know' repeated Pat quietly.

'Do you love her?' Asked Julie J suddenly. Surely not. Outside Natalie's heart rate increased dramatically, listening intently for the answer. Was it possible? Thought Natalie hopefully. Pat paused, her mouth trying hard to form an answer she could give. She didn't love her. She couldn't do. She was a nonce. And yet… In the end she only stammered.

'Oi! Buxton stopped dawdling and get a move on!' Came the voice of Hollamby from outside. The Julies and Pat froze as they heard a stuttered reply from just outside the door. They moved out the door to see the blonde's retreating back. She had obviously heard everything. 'What are you lot standing there for?' demanded Bodybag 'Do something useful' she snapped ushering them out. Pat watched Natalie's back, how much had she heard? What did that mean? What did any of it mean? Pat's mind spun with these thought.

Natalie rushed ahead, unsure what to make of the conversation she had overheard. Pat had claimed it wouldn't happen again, but yet she had denied that she loved her. She loves me? Thought Natalie, her stomach twisting. Do I love her? She thought to herself. Lost in all these thought she didn't even notice the new arrival as she when across to the counter.

'New girl for you to play with' announced Bodybag 'Marta Bra-zi...Bra-zi-ck, oh who knows, silly flaming name anyway' finished Bodybag irritated.

'Brzycki' snapped the girl in a thick Polish accent, her bright blue eyes looking fiercely out of her pale face from under her veil of jet black hair. 'Baa…rraaa…zzzz…iiiiccc…keee not that fucking hard. Just you fucking English can't learn to speak properly' she continued glaring at Bodybag. Looking round Marta slowly looked challengingly over each person's face her blue eyes so bright it felt to everyone like she was x-raying them.

Natalie was crossing back across the dining room, her thoughts elsewhere. Looking up she froze as she looked at Marta. She hadn't seen her for three years; she was one of the first arrivals all those years ago. Marta seemed to sense eyes on her looking up at Natalie her whole body stiffening, her face going even paler her face as white as a sheet. Three years ago came flooding back to Marta; all the nightmares seemed real again. She never thought she would look on that face again, the one who had brought her here when she was just twelve. As everyone noticed the sudden drop in temperature, Marta's face filled with rage and fear, making her looked insane. Through the icy silence a single syllable escaped Marta's lips.

'You.'

Username:2004206 Page: 4 27/05/2010


	9. Lessons

For nearly a minute nobody moved as nonce and victim stared at each other. Marta, frozen by anger and fear, Natalie with shock, anticipation and, surprising to her, a twinge of guilt. Slowly Natalie moved across the dining area, approaching Bodybag without breaking eye contact with Marta. Marta eyed her suspiciously, ready to run if necessary.

'She can't be in here with me Miss' said Natalie quietly turning to look at Mrs Hollamby 'She was one of my…girls' she finished the last word twisting awkwardly out of her. Glancing nervously at Marta she could see, like everyone else, something was going on behind those insanely bright eyes. Pat looked rapidly between Marta and Natalie, torn between protecting the victim, but also a strange need to protect Natalie. Everyone stared at the young Polish girl, who seemed rooted to the spot.

Eventually Marta seemed to snap, suddenly bolting over the servery counter in an imitation of Pat's arrival, smashing the knife cupboard before anyone could react. Then quick as a flash she leaped at the Julies grabbing Julie S and holding the knife to her exposed neck.

'Ju!' Shouted Julie J terrified.

'Shut the fuck up!' Shouted Marta 'You!' she said indicating Bodybag 'Handcuffs' she demanded. When Bodybag didn't move she yelled 'NOW!' Hollamby looked frantically around, looking for inspiration on how to react.

'Do as she says' muttered Natalie, already seeing the pale girl's plan, unsure how to prevent it, or even if she wanted to. Looking terrified Bodybag slowly moved across the dining room tossing her set of cuffs to Marta. They landed just short of where Marta stood holding Julie S by the throat. Letting out an irritated growl Marta looked at Buxton before speaking to Julie J.

'You' she said addressing Julie J before indicating Buxton 'cuff her to the bars or your friend dies' she said jerking Julie S's head back to enforce her threat. As Julie S whimpered in fear, Julie J slowly picked up the cuffs, casting a petrified look between Buxton and Julie S. She felt stuck in an impossible situation, she knew she couldn't cuff Natalie by force, she was too strong but she couldn't let Julie S die either. Natalie looked between Johnson and Marta, reading Johnson's dilemma in her expression.

'Come on Johnson, I won't bite' Sighed Natalie resigned to her fate knowing it would happen whatever so she might as well prevent anyone else's bloodshed. Pat stared at Natalie, unable to believe she was sacrificing herself to this and Pat wasn't the only one. Marta glared suspiciously at Buxton, trying to detect an underlying motive, Julie J moved very slowly forward fearful that Natalie secretly had other plans. Natalie quickly grew impatient as Johnson continued to hesitate.

'For God's sake' muttered Natalie darkly moving forwards to snatch the handcuffs off Johnson before backing against the bars and cuffing herself. Marta blinked confused, surprised by this, still highly suspicious of this behaviour. Nudging Julie S to move forward she edged round to see for herself that Buxton really was cuffed. Satisfied she really was, Marta released Julie S, thrusting her towards Julie J before she stormed towards Buxton knocking her jaw up to hold the knife to her throat. Pat flinched involuntarily, fighting the urge to protect Natalie from this.

'Give me one reason why I shouldn't' demanded Marta, her face within inches of Natalie's, as she twisted the knife slightly on Natalie's neck applying just short of the pressure needed to end her life. Natalie looked into the young girl's bright eyes, wishing she had an answer, also unnerved how much those blue eyes reminded her of Pat's.

'I don't have one' Natalie replied eventually 'I mean it's not like anyone would care would they? After all, I'm just a nonce' she added bitterly, her eyes flickering passed Marta to briefly meet Pat's eyes. Pat felt her stomach twist uncomfortably, knowing that comment was directed at her, wanting to contradict it but also feeling that Marta had every right to do this. Marta stared at Natalie, shocked that there was no fear in her eyes, just sadness which wasn't like the Buxton she remembered. Neither was the strange bitter and lonely edge to the tone she'd used.

'I think it can wait' Marta said taking the knife away from Natalie's neck. 'Meanwhile how about you tell this lot why it is I want to kill you' she continued backing away slightly, twiddling the knife between her fingers. Natalie looked at her blankly, unsure what it was she wanted her to tell.

'They already know about that.' She replied quietly, mentally cringing remembering why they did and who had caught her out.

'Really?' asked Marta angrily 'They know about you smuggling underage girls into England to make you a fortune shagging a load of paedophiles?' Natalie flinched sheepishly at that comment.

'Yes' she muttered casting her eyes to the floor as her cheeks burned in shame feeling Pat's eyes on her. Marta watched her, glad she was suffering this humiliation. Anger building inside Marta starting pacing slightly in front of Natalie her sense of power overwhelming.

'Interesting' Marta mumbled continuing to pace before suddenly lashing out, her fist cracking onto Natalie's cheekbone before smashing her nose. Natalie let out a small cry of pain as she felt her nose break, blood splattering across her face. Marta back away slightly, her blood pumping furiously round her body, taking in the immense satisfaction of seeing Buxton in pain. People around them began to jeer, many urging Marta on, others half heartedly trying to persuade her to stop. The Julies looked across at Kerrigan, seeing her fidget, twisting her hands clearly displaying her discomfort. They could see the torn expression on her face as she fought an internal battle of priorities. Marta was the victim of terrible abuse, she had a right to do this…but did Buxton deserve it? Had she begun to change? So many thoughts spun round Kerrigan's head as Marta began to pace again.

Natalie looked up from her pain into Marta's face, seeing the anger that burned. She could also see the effect the sense of control was having, she knew full well how addictive it was when whether someone suffered or not was in your hands. The sense of power gave an incredible high, so much so it could be as addictive as any drug. Putting your power over someone to the test to see how far it could go was dangerous and exciting and could lead to very bad things happening you never thought you would do.

'So Buxton' said Marta breathing hard as her rage burned furiously 'How about you tell them who gave me this' she continued jerking the right side of her top up to reveal a nasty red burn on that side which spanned from her waist to just below her breast across her ribs. Everyone gasped staring at the burn, which looked almost like a severe rash if the shine of it told it was a burn. Natalie stared down at it feeling a bit sick, swallowing before answering.

'I did.' She said so quietly everyone could only just hear her.

'Speak up.' Snarled Marta thrusting her top back down.

'I did.' Repeated Natalie with a lot louder her voice cracking slightly as she looked guilty down at the floor.

'And why exactly was that?' Marta sneered angrily remembering the petty reason. When Natalie didn't reply Marta cracked her fist into her stomach with such force Natalie was winded, gasping for breath. 'Tell them' ordered Marta.

'Because…' Natalie begun, still trying to catch her breath 'I had an argument with Paul…and you were an easy target' she finished, the added when Marta indicated for her to carry on. 'You picked up on why I was in a bad mood…so I threw boiling water down you' Natalie finished, pulling a face at the memory of her loss of temper. Pat looked at the blonde woman, grief flowing through her, remembering their water fight now with a slightly sick feeling.

'You evil bitch' said Marta saying every word slowly to emphasise it. 'You ruined _my _life, god knows how many more, you just don't get it do you?' Marta shouted suddenly overwhelmed with emotion. Natalie looked at the broken girl, longing to understand but somehow not.

'No, I don't' Natalie replied 'I don't get it. It would be far simpler if I did but I always think I did you all a favour. I mean, it's what you all did back in your own countries wasn't it?' Natalie asked questioningly winching at the outraged gasps from many people surrounding her. Marta looked up at her tormentor, reading in her expression this wasn't an attempt at being a bitch, she really didn't understand.

'You're not even sorry are you?' asked Marta furiously.

'Would you believe me if I said I was? I mean, once a nonce always a nonce.' Natalie shot back challengingly. Marta paused, considering this.

'No I wouldn't believe you.' She answered eventually. Raising the knife with a shaking hand to Natalie's throat she added 'You should die, bitch.' After a second's hesitation she lowered the knife back down placing it in her pocket before losing control. Furiously Marta mercilessly delivered blow after blow Natalie gasping every now and then as she was slowly beaten to a pulp.

….

_Later_

Delivering a final blow, Marta broke down backing away a few feet from the unconscious woman before collapsing to the floor crying. The knife slid out of her pocket as she clutched her face as her emotions overwhelmed her. She couldn't kill her. Not even the evil nonce that had ruined her life.

Natalie stirred, blood gushing from her beaten face as the rest of her body was burning signalling the arrival of many bruises. Natalie looked down at the crying girl, guilt flowing through her despite her vicious beating. Feeling it was time, she twisted her wrists skilfully freeing herself from the cuffs. Pulling her arms free she moved away from the bars. Everyone gasped, making Marta glance up diving terrified for the knife as Natalie stood on the blade.

'Hey hey hey' Natalie whispered softly gesturing the terrified Marta back. Slowly Natalie lifted her foot before quickly kicking the knife out of reach of both of them. Marta stared up at Natalie her heart beating rapidly before her eyes moved to the cuffs in Natalie's hand.

'How did you…?' Marta asked bewildered knowing she had checked she was really cuffed. Marta flinched as Natalie smiled slightly.

'Twenty years in the whore business learning how to get out of cuffs in an emergency is a skill worth learning.' Natalie explained shrugging modestly as she lowered herself to sit beside Marta, wincing in pain. Marta stared at the nonce, the truth dawning on her.

'You just stood there and took it?' Stated Marta shocked. 'I could have killed you' she said barely above a whisper as Natalie nodded.

'You could have.' Natalie agreed. 'As for this' Natalie indicated her battered state 'I've had worse. Besides, looked like you needed it out your system' she said shrugging.

'Blimey, you got a brain tumour sending you loopy? This ain't like you Miss' Said Marta puzzled.

'Don't call me Miss, its Natalie' said Natalie a bit sharply; readjusting her tone as Marta recoiled she added smiling 'Well I did suffer a blow to the head a few weeks back. Maybe that did it.' Marta looked sceptical, still dazed by this strange behaviour.

'You still don't get what you did wrong though do you Miss?…I mean Natalie' said Marta quickly correcting herself.

'No' sighed Natalie 'it's the world I grew up in Marta, with far worse things happening it never seemed that wrong. Guess my morals are wrongly wired. And being around male bastards I guess didn't help set a good example' Natalie shrugged 'Still; I hope that given time maybe I'll see the world differently.'

'Why in the world did you always go for such bastards then?' Marta inquired slightly bemused.

'Because surrounded by bigger arseholes than yourself you feel like a saint.' Natalie replied as if this was obvious. 'Any more questions?' she continued faintly amused.

'Just one.' Said Marta, continuing when gestured 'Why have you really changed? That's something _I_ don't get.' Meeting the young girl's eyes Natalie paused, wondering how to explain what she didn't want to share.

'Ever wanted something so badly, yet know you can't have it?' Asked Natalie. Marta frowned puzzled nodding slowly. 'Well…it's far worse when you know it's because of everything you are, and that even if you wanted to be someone else it's too late. Once a nonce always a nonce.' Natalie finished sadly glancing up to meet Pat's eyes. Pat looked away, again knowing this was aimed at her. Marta stared at the blonde woman tracking her brief line of sight, realising what that riddle she had just delivered meant. As the prison officers began to surround them Marta stood up, looking down seeing a completely different person.

'Well I hope she appreciates this, and lets you in her life' declared Marta, quiet enough for only Natalie to hear. Natalie stared open mouthed at the young girl, silently asking how she'd known she had meant she wanted someone, let alone knew it was a woman. Smiling Marta answered 'When you come to a country with a different language understanding gestures and meaningful looks is a skill worth learning.' She shrugged modestly smiling before being lead away by the prison officers.

Username:2004206 Page: 5 07/06/2010


	10. Final Deal

Pat paced her cell, her thoughts too frantic to settle. Marta had been taken down the block, Natalie to the hospital wing again leaving Pat amongst all the other inmates. Having no desire to hear all their theories to add confusion to her already spinning mind she had come up to her cell. Nearly two hours later it was lock down and the prison officer had refused to answer her questions about Natalie except with a 'She's stable.' What the fuck did that mean? Flinging herself down on her bed with more force than necessary Pat shifted restlessly. As the lights went out she looked across her cell at Natalie's bed, her thoughts on last night. How long ago that felt like, Pat thought dully before sleep finally beckoned.

The next couple of days there was no word on Natalie or Marta, Pat grew more and more restless. She had tried to keep herself busy but she couldn't help but miss Natalie so much. As she went about the day she couldn't help but think of her constantly. Eating her breakfast alone Pat thought of how Natalie would be telling her off for being greedy. The twinge of grief soon put an end to her appetite. Returning to her cell for a third night without Natalie Pat signed as she settled down ready for another night alone when she heard keys outside her cell. Pat bolted upright as the door swung open to reveal a prison officer, followed by Natalie. Silently Natalie entered the cell, the door being locked behind her.

Looking sheepishly at Pat, the pair stared silently into each other's eyes before Natalie moved to her side of the cell. She still looked rough, with two black eyes but far better without the blood across her face. Buxton placed her stuff down stiffly in clear discomfort looking for her bed clothes, refusing to let herself look at Pat. She couldn't bear to see the disappointment, maybe even disgust in her face. Pat watched Natalie's back, not knowing what to say. She had so much in her head, but no way to say it in a way that made sense. Eventually Natalie half turned to address Pat over her shoulder, still without looking round.

'I'm going to Miss Stokes to talk about leaving tomorrow.' She stated quietly. It took a second for what she said to translate in Pat's overloaded mind.

'What?' Pat said shocked 'Why?' Natalie shrugged.

'Marta and me can't stay in the same prison' She said 'Besides…its better this way.' Natalie added, her voice cracking slightly from the emotion twisting inside her. 'I'll speak to Miss Stokes in the morning; hopefully I'll be gone by the afternoon. Leave you…and everyone else here in peace.' Pat stared at the blonde's back before crossing the cell to be just behind Natalie's back.

'Natalie…' Pat whispered in a strained tone. The single word seemed to say so much. Natalie against her will looked round at Pat, thrown off guard by the use of her first name; Pat had always called her Buxton. Meeting green eyes with blue Natalie felt a massive somersault twist in her stomach seeing those eyes staring so intently at her. Swallowing slightly trying to dislodge the lump in her throat she edged away as she turned back to her bed clothes.

'Don't…' She whispered feeling so uncomfortable with feeling Pat so close. Pat watched as the blonde reached down to remove her shoes, a mixture of emotions twisting in her gut. This was so hard. Pat's thoughts wondered back to the confrontation Natalie had had, to the comment she had made about her.

'Did you really believe that nobody would care if Marta had killed you?' Pat asked quietly. Did Natalie really think she didn't care? Did she care? She thought, knowing the answer full well. She had cared long before their night together.

'Yes.' Natalie answered just as quietly, fidgeting awkwardly with nothing to do but undress to change she turned round to perch on the edge of her bed. Looking up from under her hair she continued 'Why would anyone?' She challenged 'Like I said then, I'm only a nonce.' Pat flinched at the phrase, wishing she would stop referring to herself as that. Refusing to react to the challenge she changed the focus back to Natalie.

'Why are you really going?' Demanded Pat 'Because of me?' Natalie paused, wishing there was a way to escape this conversation. She wasn't sure she could deal with it, Pat asking questions she hadn't even begun to understand herself.

'Like I said. Its better this way.' She said evasively, avoiding the underlying question for all her life. After an awkward pause, Pat saw no other way around the question she had been burning to ask.

'Do you love me?' She asked, her voice reaching a higher pitch than usual. Natalie's cheeks flushed, visible even beneath her battered face. She looked intently at the floor before she gathered the courage to look into Pat's face.

'Yes.' She answered, her throat going dry as she quickly looked away again. Pat looked down into the battered face, not sure whether to be relieved or feel worse. Swallowing she pressed on.

'Then don't leave.' Pat stated, unsuccessfully trying to keep the slight pleading note in her voice. Picking up on the tone, Natalie struggled to keep her eyes from welling up. She couldn't stay, she knew that, but now she knew Pat felt for her too…

'It's not that simple.' She replied, barely keeping her voice steady. As Pat went to challenge it she added 'Weren't you listening to a word Marta said?' She demanded, forcing her emotion into anger to stop herself crying.

'Of course I did.' Pat snapped back just as sharply. Natalie shook her head, unbelieving that wasn't enough for Pat to realise she was no good for her.

'Doesn't that bother you?' Asked Natalie disbelieving.

'Of course it does…but people change.' Pat replied, trying to convince herself along with Natalie. 'I saw how you were singing on stage last week; I bet you've never been happier and that involved no casualties' Pat tried to joke. Natalie just stared at her blankly, clearly not appreciating the joke.

'Pat…you hate me as it is, and you haven't even scratched the surface!' Natalie said trying desperately to get Pat to understand. Pat blinked briefly before replying.

'I don't hate you…' she replied quietly, shocked Natalie clearly thought so. 'I love you…' She muttered even quieter so Natalie barely heard. Natalie blushed, pretending she didn't hear that.

'Yer?' shot back Natalie 'You might amazingly not hate me now, but how long until something else comes crawling out my past? You know nothing about my life before you meet me.' Natalie finished, her mind spinning round all that Pat didn't know. Pat looked down at the woman she had gone from hating to loving, not fully knowing if she wanted to know everything or not.

'Then tell me.' Pat said eventually, seeing this was the only way they would both know if they could forgive and forget. 'I'll start.' She continued as Natalie looked up surprised under her blonde hair. Pat sat down next to Natalie, clearing her throat before continuing. 'My name is Patricia Kerrigan, born 13th May 1969. My parents and my little three year old sister Lily died in a car accident when I was five. From the age of six I lived at St Paul's children's home with the paedophile priest and sadistic nun until I was sixteen when I suffered a nervous breakdown when my friend Lucy committed suicide. Then I was moved into a foster home and pumped full of anti-depressants. I wondered from job to job, arsehole boyfriend to arsehole boyfriend still being pumped full of anti-depressants until I was thirty two when my ex boyfriend was kicking the shit out of me so I stabbed him to death in self defence. Hence how I ended up in prison. Then saw Sister Thomas in the newspaper as being here so I got myself transferred and you know the rest.' Finished Pat, feeling slightly odd at telling the tale of her life story. Natalie looked at Pat, surprised how vulnerable she had been when she was clearly so tough now. Seeing Pat looking at her expectantly Natalie looked away before answering.

'My story is far longer and far more complicated.' Natalie replied still resisting revealing everything.

'Well we have all night if you need it. It's not 'til tomorrow morning before you can go anyway. If you still want to go then, I can't exactly stop you, if nothing else it might help to get it off your chest.' Pat replied moving further up Natalie's bed, opening her arms gesturing for Natalie to lay with her. Hesitating Natalie lowered herself carefully, avoiding her bruises, into Pat's arms, shifting her head onto Pat's chest, heart racing as Pat wrapped her arms round her. Sighing, Natalie began.

Natalie talked for hours telling her story in detail, starting with being born to two parents who were deep in the nasty end of the sex trade. She shifted uncomfortably telling Kerrigan how from a very young age she had been used as a sex slave for paedophiles, noting bitterly maybe that was why she didn't see her own girls as being that bad a deal. Pat listened silently as Natalie told her of the constant abuse of her father, from violence to actually raping her. Natalie continued to when at the age of eleven her parents had been arrested for drug dealing and she had been fostered by a couple and their sixteen year old son, them only doing it for the money so they didn't give her anything either in the form of material goods or love and care. She told how within a year the son started showing an unhealthy interest in her, and how she learnt she could use it to her advantage, being able to blackmail him into buying her things so she kept quiet about his secret.

Moving into adulthood she spoke of her career starting as a street prostitute, her pimp fixing her up with the wealthy customers in return for supplying her with drugs. She told how she had learnt to use only a moderate amount herself, to sell the rest on to those unable to persuade their pimp or afford them. She had learnt how to manipulate them into working for her in exchange for freebies. It was here she had begun pimping herself, knowing where hotspots were, and dealing drugs to trap women into working for her.

As she had worked up through the industry, she had come across men that talked of different ideas, such as the child trafficking. At first she hadn't been interested but ended up dating Alex, the arsehole who slept with his own kids. He had never told her, though she had figured it out, knowing the look of an abused child. She hadn't left though; glad of the security Alex gave her. Her father had been released from prison and she was afraid of him coming looking for her so Alex acted as insurance against others, and living with him meant she didn't have to work the streets anymore.

When Alex was arrested she became desperate again, not wanting to return to the streets so when her ex, Paul had begun dating her, the idea of trafficking became more and more acceptable. She told how Paul made her feel safe and loved how he had never treated her badly, nor any of the girls they trafficked. She had hoped she would marry him one day. Sniffing at that idea now, Natalie continued to when she had been arrested for tax fraud. She had been so much in control of the running of her business Paul didn't know quite how to run it undetected. Because of this he had got them both caught, she had ended up here. Pat listened intrigued how Natalie had worked individually on everyone, winning them over, shifting uncomfortable when Natalie admitted how she had slept with Kris, Ben, Fenner and Spiers. Finally coming to the end of her story Natalie shifted awkwardly, feeling better that she had nothing more to hide, but dirty because Pat now knew the truth. For a long while both were silent, Natalie becoming agitated knowing Pat would definitely want nothing to do with her now. Pat lay saying nothing, taking everything in. It was so sick, but parts of it explained why Natalie was the way she was.

Natalie pulled away from Pat, unable to bear how dirty she felt. Perching at the very end of her bed she looked away as she cried silently. Eventually Pat climbed off the bed, going to Natalie taking her hands in her own as she kneeled before her. Natalie looked down at Pat surprised she wasn't trying to be as far away as possible. Looking up into Natalie's dark green eyes, seeing a neglected child rather than a cruel nonce. Swallowing she spoke.

'That everything?' whispered Pat, praying to God she didn't believe in that it was. Natalie nodded. Pulling herself together Natalie stood, pulling Pat up with her. Pulling her hands awkwardly away Natalie looked back into those bright blue eyes, steadying her voice.

'Now you know. Maybe now you know why it's good that I'm leaving.' Natalie stated simply, managing to force emotion out her voice, replaced with stony indifference. Pat looked at her, seeing straight through this act.

'It's not about whether it's "good" or not. This is about you being a coward and running away from your feelings for me.' Pat shot back. Natalie blinked startled, surprised by this sudden change of tone into bluntness. Gathering herself she replied.

'So what if it is?' She challenged bitterly 'It's better than spending the next ten years with someone as a nonce.'

'Stop calling yourself that.' Snapped Pat angrily. Calming herself she continued 'Do you want to be with me?' she asked. Natalie lowered her eyes as she nodded. 'I'll do you a deal Natalie.' Pat mumbled. Natalie looked up from the floor, curiosity winning over wariness.

'Oh yer? What deal would that be?' Natalie inquired carefully unsure what to expect.

'How about we never use the word nonce again, and we'll be as if I didn't know all you just told me. Just like we had meet out in the real world and none of the past ever happened.' Pat said as Natalie frowned slightly sensing she was missing something. 'Two conditions.' Pat added.

'_Two?_ I swear it's traditional only to have one…I mean…go on' Natalie said quickly seeing Pat raise her eyebrows warningly.

'One, no more doing stuff with drugs, dealing, taking them yourself etc' Pat paused as Natalie made a noise of pain 'Two, try not to be such a bitch to people, try to be nice, I'm sure you can manage, by the sounds of it you've been a lot nicer recently.' Pat finished.

'You are harsh. _No_ drugs? _None_?' Natalie said as if in great pain. Pat shook her head, watching Natalie expectantly. Signing Natalie added 'So, I stop any drug handling, and stop treading on people and that's it?' Natalie asked concluding. Pat nodded before speaking.

'Deal?' Pat asked moving closer to Natalie. Natalie smiled, this seemed a reasonable price.

'Deal.' Natalie replied as they moved together for their first mutually planned kiss.

THE END

Username:2004206 Page: 5 10/06/2010


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